December 2017 Mental Health Awareness


December:
A month to think of OTHERS
as we celebrate

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the Mental Health Awareness series

It takes one person to make a difference —
just think of what thousands can do.

~ Psychology Today 2016 Awareness Calendar

Mark your blogging calendars

Each year is peppered with a great many special dates dedicated to raising awareness about important emotional, physical and psychological health issues.

In addition to a calendar for the current month, each Awareness post offers a list highlighting important days and weeks that impact mental health, along with those that remain in place for the entire month.

If I’ve missed anything, please let me know in the comments below so that I can add it to the list.

Attention Bloggers: As always, if you write (or have written) an article that adds content to this post, feel free to leave a link in the comment section and I will move it into its appropriate category.

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THANKS to all who read & commented on My Birthday Prayer


You are much appreciated
AND there is more to be done & more we ALL can do

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
from the Mental Health Awareness Series

Turning a Comment into a Post

I added a comment to my Birthday Post to thank my readers and followers for the amazing response from so many of you who took the time to read the story behind my prayer.

I so appreciate everyone who commented with empathy, as well as with the disgust that *I* feel for the TRAGIC and avoidable murder of the son of a good friend, colleague, and leading light in the ADD community.

I am expanding it into an Advocacy article, hoping that more of you will see it.

So what’s the MORE?

God Bless YOU all – and now I hope everyone will be proactive, speaking truth to “power” with a reach further than that of the blogging community.

I ask you to write or call your elected representatives and local hospital administrators – and that you repeat this story to your doctors with an expression of concern that something similar could EVER happen to you or someone you love.

It’s desperately needed, regardless of where you live in the free world.

The police are not the central problem here – but their lack of mental health training IS a serious issue that has needed addressing for a very long time. And that, my friends, is a matter for specifically targeted appropriations – or, as it turns out, lack thereof.

The APA (American Psychological Association) and AMA (Medical) could us a major tune up as well.

What happened medically that allowed this tragedy to occur was and IS INexcusable, totally avoidable and, unfortunately, not rare.

We, too, can become effective Lobbyists

ALL decision and policy makers need to be encouraged to assign a staff member to start reading the blogs of the mental health advocates, the chronic pain & PTSD sufferers and of a great many individuals attempting to get adequate and EMPATHETIC care from their doctors and nurses.

Many too many health care professionals seem more afraid of black and white DEA retribution – due to the way in which the DEA enforces their policies, intended to lower drug abuse statistics, to undercut the effective treatment for a variety of disabilities and disorders – than they are of being called out for providing seriously substandard care to many in the mental health community. REGULARLY.

Inexcusable, of course, but professional cowardice is at least understandable on some level.  What is NOT understandable is the rude and insensitive way in which many patients are treated by the doctors and nurses they look to and PÅY for help and understanding.

I see tales of lousy treatment on most of the blogs – and insensitive treatment on ALL of them. 

I hope that everyone who has posted an article supporting this statement will leave a link in a comment — those will become the only Related Posts for this article.

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Mental Health Awareness in December


A Light Month, Awareness-wise

So let’s take a look at what our
recently elected politicians have in store for healthcare

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the Mental Health Awareness series

It takes one person to make a difference —
just think of what thousands can do.

~ Psychology Today 2016 Awareness Calendar

For your blogging calendars

Each year is peppered with a great many special dates dedicated to raising awareness about important emotional, physical and psychological health issues.

In addition to a calendar for the current month, each Awareness post usually offers a list highlighting important days and weeks that impact mental health, along with those that remain in place for the entire month.

In December, the only thing I could find remotely related was this:

National Aplastic Anemia Awareness Week — 
December 1-7
Aplastic Anemia and MDS International Foundation

If I’ve missed anything, please let me know in the comments below so that I can add it to the list.

Attention Bloggers: As always, if you write (or have written) an article that adds content to this post, feel free to leave a link in the comment section and I will move it into its appropriate category.

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Nick: A Personal Triumph over Brain Damage


He’s come back from so much
– proof that nothing is impossible with hard work
and a dream

a hand-crafted reblog adding to the What Kind of World Series
Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

Autonomy implies Independent motion

In 2009, the 25 year old son of one of the most positive lights in the blogging community, Sue Vincent, had his youthful potential cut short. He was stabbed through the brain with a screwdriver in an unprovoked attack and left for dead in an alley.  His prognosis was grim.

He was not expected to survive at all – and not expected to have much of a life worth living if he did.  They were told that if he woke, it would probably be to a vegetative state. At best, he might have the mind and abilities of a two-year-old. The damage was extensive and irreversible. He would need constant care for the rest of his life.

The triumph of will

Over the past couple of years, many in the blogging community already know he did survive, defying all the odds, fighting his way back to achieve wonderful things in spite of the physical challenges with which he lives still, wheelchair bound.

Sue’s article describes even more about his inspiring story, and links to posts about his courage in the face of subsequent challenges, as well as his incredible adventures since that day.

She blogs of the magic of May Day, his skydive… the London to Brighton cycle ride (raising funds for Headway, a charity supporting brain injury victims and their families) … and the Triathlon — all of which raised thousands of pounds for charity.

More than I would attempt, for SURE!

The London to Brighton cycle challenge was a ride of some 54 miles (87km).

It included the ascent of Ditchling Beacon, which climbs nearly 500 feet in less than a mile… all, according to Sue, carrying a bag that weighs as much as a small county on the back as well.

It was made possible with help — others who donated time and the strength of their own bodies to make sure the equipment that supported Nick’s goal was packed and transported so that Nick was able to start and complete the ride.

But Nick dreams of still MORE.

Autonomy enough to travel

Sue explains in her article that Nick’s dream of autonomy with travel is currently hampered by a plethora of problems accepted as “normal” with his current “trike” – in a manner that some angel on earth has found a way to overcome with the Mountain Trike, a cross between a mountain bike and a wheelchair.

More than the smooth terrain necessary for most wheelchairs, this trike can go off-road and up mountains. It can handle sandy beaches, ford streams and cope with muddy tracks and cobbles. It even has a luggage rack.

More important, it is a manual wheelchair with an innovative propulsion system that Nick can use, even with reduced mobility and struggles with coordinating both sides of his body.

It doesn’t need batteries, can be fixed by most bike shops in an emergency and, crucially, doesn’t need anyone to push it. He can go out into the wild places alone for the very first time in seven and a half years.

Source: Independent motion – can you help?

Meet Nick

A few of you may follow Nick’s blog and may already have read about his recent preparations for his biggest adventure yet — looking forward to accomplishing the impossible once again, proving that ‘impossible’ really isn’t, if you set your mind and heart to something.

If you are new to Nick’s story, I hope you will give yourself the gift of reading about it – and that you will take the time to watch the video he has included on THIS post – especially those of you who are close to giving in and giving up.
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Ten Things I Do Not Want in My President


November is too close
to remain silent
Even though this is not a political blog

Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
from the What kind of world do you want Series

This is no longer about Trump

I found the following words in an article on the blog of the HopeWorks Community. I was inspired to check out what else they had written on this topic, and I was moved to “reblog” the words that expressed some of my thinking better than I could myself.

The Real Question is about US

“This is no longer about the decency of Donald Trump. If there were lingering doubts the tape recently released should remove [them].

The real question is about us. What have we become? What are we yet to become?

The question is not about whether or not not we are going to be great, but at what point what happened to the idea of us being good?  

Do we believe the moral integrity of our leaders is irrelevant to the leadership they provide as long as they give lip service to the policies we support. At what point is enough actually enough — or is it ever?

When do people understand that, “What about Hillary?” is neither explanation or justification for the disgrace that is Donald Trump? When?”                          . . . continue reading Source HERE

About the things I do not want

The words below are not my own either, but they so clearly express much of what I believe, they might as well be.  I changed the order of the points around a bit, but the words are straight from HopeWorks.
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#GoSilent on Memorial Day 2016


Honoring Memorial Day

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World Series

If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
~ John McCrae, May 1915

How do YOU relate to Memorial Day?

For many fortunate people – 80% of us, according to a poll taken by the National World War II Museum —  Memorial Day is little more than the official beginning of summer. It’s the day we get our barbeques and lawn furniture out of storage to picnic with family and friends until our Labor Day parties mark summer’s end.

One of the longest-standing events that many will attend this year is the Indianapolis 500, held on the Sunday of Memorial Day weekend.

NASCAR‘s Coca-Cola 600 has been held later that day since 1961 and, since 1976, the Memorial [Golf] Tournament has been held on or close to Memorial Day.

And still . . .

For too many other Americans, however, Memorial Day marks the anniversary of the day they honor that other day – the one that changed their lives forever – a day of remembrance when they hope that the deaths of their loved ones will never be forgotten, and when they pray that their fathers, husbands, uncles, nephews, sons and grandsons did not die in vain.

It is the one day set aside for all of us to honor and remember, as a nation, the men and women who lost their lives while serving in the United States Armed Forces.

It happens every year on the last Monday of May
May 30th in 2016

Many people will take time to visit cemeteries and memorials around the county to honor the loved ones of others who have given their lives in military service, as well as anyone they know personally who has made the ultimate sacrifice.

Various groups of volunteers will visit national cemeteries to place American flags on soldiers’ graves.

Cities and townships across the nation will hold stately parades led by marching bands, often including Army jeeps and other military vehicles, antique as well as current.  The National Guard is often featured in those parades, along with Air Force, Army, Navy, Marine Corps, Coast Guard — active servicemen and women marching alongside veterans of all ages, in uniforms representing many too many wars and even more fallen soldiers.

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Rarely Proud to be an American Anymore


How did our country become so selfish?
An interaction that left me Grumpy – and it’s not even Monday!

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
in the Monday Grumpy Monday Series

Walkin’ my Dog

As someone who moved around a lot throughout my life, I am currently living a considerably more isolated life than I would prefer because I have landed in a town I can’t really understand – Cincinnati, Ohio.

From my experience, at least, Cincinnati seems to be one of those towns I’ve come to call “passport towns.”

An introduction from somebody who’s grown up here – or lived here for most of his or her life – seems to be a prerequisite for even so much as a welcoming smile many days, and certainly the passport needed to develop a community of true friends. Since my move here several years ago, I have found myself quite lonely as a result.

True friends share each others’ lives, not merely conversations in passing or occasional calls for help or understanding in times of trouble. Most of my friends are scattered across the nation, so I frequently get a hankering for a a bit of face-to-face interaction, even though, since Kate Kelly’s passing, I no longer know anyone in Cincinnati I could count among my true friends.

Enforced isolation is something I have not experienced since, many years ago now, I first moved to New Orleans, Louisiana for grad school – another passport town. That surprised me, by the way. I’ve always made friends easily, and it’s extremely rare to need a passport in the South. But I think I finally figured it out.

Commonalities

I’ve observed that the two towns I mentioned are alike in this way: people who grow up there tend to stay put or move back “home,” perhaps because they finally tire of living in some other passport town where they couldn’t develop a community of friends either. In any case, a great many of the residents of these towns seem disinclined to widen their circles to include a stranger without the requisite introduction from a local.

Taking my own advice (from the Series I have been writing on loneliness and isolation), my little dog TinkerToy and I get out several times a day – and I smile warmly at everyone I pass on our walks around the neighborhood (even if they don’t return my smile). I engage anyone who seems the least bit friendly in a passing conversation.

“Hi, how are you?”
“Don’t you just love (or hate) this weather?”

When I notice an expression on a face that seems to indicate that they are about to bring our little chat to a close, I wave them on and tell them I hope they have a nice day.

Related posts:
The Importance of Community to Health
When You’re Longing for Connection

But passport towns are not the central point of today’s post.
Walking my dog is how I came to meet Staff Sergeant Brown.

Some actual connection

My little Shih Tzu TinkerToy and I frequently pass a small cigarettes-snacks-and-beer store that serves the many college students in this section of the walking neighborhood I currently call home. Staff Sergeant Brown was sitting on a stoop out in front, keeping watch on two large garbage bags bulging with cans.

Do you know what he can get for those cans these days?  A whole thirty cents – per pound.

And that’s how this courageous, 63 year old veteran of FOUR wars is currently supporting himself – because he is too proud to beg.

Don’t forget that you can always check out the sidebar
for a reminder of how links work on this site, they’re subtle ==>

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September 11 Thoughts and Links


STILL Healing the Divided Mind

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series
[link to videos by Deepak Chopra below]

September 11 will never again be an ordinary day.

click image for source

click image for source – scroll to bottom for NEW view

No longer living in Manhattan, I have developed my own “honoring” ceremony that involves searching the ‘net for articles on the topic and taking the time to read them.

I have learned to expect the posts telling their stories, expressing gratitude that their loved ones had been spared.

I have grown used to seeing the many expressions of empathy and love for those who were not so blessed – and I join them in saying a prayer for those whose loved-ones disappeared in so violent a manner.

I always expect to see expressions of unhealed pain, loss and grief – which I found again – and I pray for them too.

I also expect more than a few expressions of hot and still too fresh anger – which I also found.  I pray they will find peace.

I will always be unprepared for
expressions of revenge and retribution.

ALL of us who are able simply must continue to put energy into healing this wound that is gaping still – in America and in other countries affected by retribution-inspired violence.

We will NEVER forget, but the only way inject meaning into this senseless act of violence (and those that came before and those that followed), is to come to a place where we can experience our feelings without BEING our feelings: taking a STAND for Peace, and sourcing our actions from that stand.

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A little help from our friends can make a MIRACLE happen


Pay it Forward

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

Every single one of you can share and forward. Please DO that – for me – in appreciation for what I continue to do for all of you.

THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart

UPDATE: Go to bottom of article for photo of Andy’s new smile – thanks to ALL who helped by contributing OR forwarding.

1 minute video – click image

My very own
“Make a Wish”
campaign

There but for the
Grace of God

Go you and I

My Friend Andy needs a miracle

My request to anyone who has ever benefited from ANYTHING I have ever done is that you become a part of Andy’s miracle in any way you can.

His one-minute video explains what he needs far better than I ever could. The brief text below it adds information and context.

Please click his image – OR one of the links below – and donate just one little minute to listening to his message in his own words — then forward it (and/or reblog my plea). 

The greater the number of people who see his message, the greater the likelihood of ALL of us being part of a true miracle – saving the life of a man who will help save the lives of others.

Please, help me make it go viral.

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Headlines I Want to See in the Upcoming Year


Dream Headlines
What Kind of World do YOU Want?

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

The Upside of the Downside

MediaTreeGotta’ love the media – ONE report of a groundbreaking study and they go wild with their own interpretations — targeted to each of their particular viewers, readers, and branding.

Association blogs and websites join in from a myriad of vantage points, with the individual bloggers in hot pursuit of the same story right behind them.

Social Networks go crazy. We see related posts on Facebook, discussions on LinkedIn, tweets, YouTube videos, TED talks – the entire internet seems abuzz with the news.

Advertisers on the cutting edge target their commercials to catch the wave of increased publicity.  Product development teams are employed to increase sales by tweaking existing products and developing new ones.

MEANWHILE, new funding is approved for new studies to build on the original, further feeding the frenzy as new results are leaked and published.

ULTIMATELY, politicians get into the act as the result of public outcry; caucuses convene to draft new laws based on findings from the original research (that few probably ever read and fewer still understand).

What if it went something like THIS . . .

  • Scientists discover neural-mechanism behind turf building and cognitive competition – possible link to empathy deficiency
  • Collaboration blows competition out of water — recent research
  • Blind Men meet to combine Elephant reportage – New Picture Emerging

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Motivation and Gratitude


 – INSPIRATION –
Thank GOD for It!

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
from the What Kind of World do YOU Want Series

When life gets tough and we struggle ON

up2neck

None of us has it easy.

There are far too many days when the weather turns nasty — when life dumps its challenges from some dark cloud up-above just as we pass underneath — and we suddenly find ourselves up to our necks in complications we never saw coming.

ALL of us.

Then what? Do we give in and give up because it seems too difficult to do much of anything else?

Can we imagine soldiering on — even if we have no idea HOW we will continue to put one foot in front of the other day after day?

At times like that we have choices to make. Because life is a CHOICE — and choices can be positive or negative.  They can encourage or dis-courage our efforts to keep on keeping on.

Can we find a reason to believe that there is indeed some light at the end of our tunnels without seeing so much as a glimmer of evidence?

What choice can we make that will keep us soldiering on through blackness?

  • And sometimes it looks like we HAVE no choice — and that no one understands or cares.
  • Too many times, in each of our lives, we search desperately for a much needed gust of wind beneath our wings, straining for awareness of movement at all in air that seems stale and stagnant.

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Management Talks and Service Walks


What’s WRONG with society today:
a microcosm

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

Mail-truck

“There is more to life
than increasing its speed.”

~ Ghandi

“When leading consciously,
you use the power you have to
intentionally choose actions
that can make a profound difference
in your interactions with others –
both personally and professionally.”
Jean Kantambu Latting

Whatever Happened to Rita?

Awakening early this morning for a much-welcomed change to my usual dark-centric experience of living, I took my coffee for a walk, hoping that the exposure to early morning light might help maintain the unexpected shift in my chronorhythms.

Having time to muse in the daylight is a rare treat. I’ve missed it.

I ran into another of the mailmen I didn’t recognize, parking his mail-truck: odd only because, as long as I’ve lived here, we’ve never gotten mail delivery on our street until late afternoon.

Since Rita disappeared, it seems we are left in the hands of a series of “temps,” so nothing is truly standard about our mail delivery anymore.

It won’t be until we have our own mail carrier again.

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Bumbershoots, Metaphysics, Logic & Coaching


If I prepare for a rainy day,
does that mean it’s going to rain?

©Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
from the Coaching Series, supporting the
What Kind of World do YOU Want? Series

All Rights Reserved

Well, Of COURSE it does! Eventually. But not because you prepared for it. Your thoughts really don’t control the universe.

How powerful do you think you are?

Even if you happen to be a mighty wizard who can command the elements — what about the OTHER mighty wizards who are thinking a sunny day into place for the Teddy Bear’s Picnic or something?

If you REALLY want to control whether you are likely to remain dry, get it together to move somewhere it rarely rains – like the desert.

But aren’t Thoughts THINGS?

I’m right with you on the metaphysics of this idea, but there are a lot of thinkers on the planet.  Sometimes we get out-voted (er-um, out-thought?)

But If you think negative thoughts, you’ll bring about bad things, right?
Isn’t that The Law of Attraction?

I was tempted to buy into this fear-based point of view when I was younger – for about a nano-second.  I was led to believe that it was some kind of “Secret.”

Here are the REAL Secrets:

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ATTENTION on your driving saves $$ and lives


Check out additional info in the comments too – in answer to a great question

driveBrainYour Brain REALLYglobe2_100
Can NOT Do it!

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
From the What Kind of World Series

Heads Up!  The information reproduced below is NOT new news – yet things are getting WORSE!

Science has been studying the driving/multi-tasking dangers for years now, publishing their findings in scientific journals.

FINALLY, it is getting some serious attention from the mainstream press!

MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) did us all a huge service by getting laws on the books that cracked down on drinking and driving. Briefly, our roads were safer and traffic deaths went down.

Despite their efforts, however, we are all now at greater risk than ever because of mobile technology.

  • You probably figured out on your own that dialing, texting,
    or updating your Facebook status while driving is a seriously stupid idea.
    After all, you’d have to take your eyes off the road.
  • BUT WERE YOU AWARE that, according to scientific reaction-time studies, talking on a cell-phone while driving – EVEN hands-free – is riskier than driving with a blood-alcohol content over the legal limit?

DON’T DO IT – and don’t let the driver of a car you ride in do it either.

Just Say NO!

Those of us with attention deficits to begin with really need to heed the warning – and that category includes ALL teens, by the way, whose prefrontal cortices aren’t yet fully developed.

We simply can’t take the risk that we will act on the impulse to answer that cell phone – turn it OFF or hand it to a passenger to tell callers you are not available while you are driving.

Don’t even chance it. Make it a habit by making it your POLICY.

The lives at risk are not ALL yours to gamble!

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Vision, Mission & Purpose – anchors in an uncertain world


Developing a Personal Vision, Purpose & Mission

© Developing by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CMC, MCC, SCAC
– part of the What Kind of World Series
and the DreamCatcher™ Program

roadmapDesigning a roadmap for your BEing through the development of a personal Vision, Purpose & Mission is a HUGE Game to play with your life.

Human Resource Manager promptings to the contrary, not everyone will reach a point where they are ready to work on their Vision, Mission and Purpose — at least not in a manner where it can fulfill its promise as a transformative insight into Identity that will forever alter the steps of your life.

Creating truly authentic Vision, Purpose & Mission statements that will call your life into being usually takes considerably more time and internal focus than most people are prepared to dedicate.

It is a process more globally encompassing than the work and business objectives that are the focus of most of what you will find discussed on the internet.

It’s a Stretch

It’s not an easy process, and is decidedly not for the faint of heart. If you’re not at least a tiny bit frightened or overwhelmed, you’re probably not playing a big enough Game. Embarking on this process calls for nothing less than stepping up and owning your personal power.

You are entering the domain of pure creation.

It may feel a bit like jumping into the deep end of the pool for the very first time.  It helps to have a kindred spirit in the water, arms outstretched – it’s as tough to do in an isolated pool as it is dangerous to attempt in a shark-infested tank.

I am in the process of creating mySelf anew, and I invite anyone who is up to it to join me here on this blog during the year I have given myself to focus on re-creation.

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The Link between Leadership and Spirituality



Remember
– links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn
red on mouseover.
Hold before clicking for a window with more info


ADD in the Spirit – why NOW?

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

Sahdguru“It’s time that people were educated to trust something that doesn’t look like them, doesn’t feel like them — is different.

It’s very important that we open every nation to this possibility that, when new things come to us, it is a great possibility, it’s not a threat.
~ Sadhguru

I recently came across a thirty minute ABC News interview by Beverly O’Conner, normally broadcasting on Australia Network TV. It was an interview with a man known primarily as Sadhguru, the founder of the ISHA Foundation, a non-religious, non-profit public service organization that is operated by millions of volunteers across 150 cities.

The ISHA Foundation is headquartered in Southern India, as Sadhguru travels all over the world giving workshops and doing interviews. He is articulate, refreshingly pragmatic, and non-judgmental. My kind of guy, right?

This interview touched on a great many issues that I think about all the time and blog about a great deal of the time, albeit in different words from a very different lens:

  • stepping into leadership
  • remaining open-minded
  • giving back – balancing the energies of receiving and providing service
  • reaching out in generosity to those who have less
  • avoiding black and white thinking – “holding harmless”
  • the desperate need for a non-incendiary press that respects and enforces the boundary between reportage and “ratings”

— all of which are only some of the components of
a world that works for everyone

.

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Shame on Shoulds



Remember
– links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn
red on mouseover.

Assumptions with an Edge

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

Shame on you

“Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.” ~ Brené Brown

“Shame is a soul eating emotion.” 
C.G. Jung

By the time most of us have learned to talk, we have internalized many of the expectations of each of our respective environments as if they were THE incontrovertible rules of life on earth.

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When you lose patience with your ADD kid


Remember – links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn red on mouseover.

Read THIS for an instant Reframe

reposted by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Posted in my FaceBook Feed
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

StrongestDad

No matter how hard it seems,
the longer you persist
the more likely your success.
~ Jack Canfield

Strongest Dad in the World
by Rick Reilly

Eighty-five times he’s pushed his disabled son, Rick, 26.2 miles in marathons.

Eight times he’s not only pushed him 26.2 miles in a wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dinghy while swimming. and pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars – all in the same day.

Dick’s also pulled him cross-country skiing, taken him on his back mountain climbing and once hauled him across the U.S. on a bike.

Makes taking your son bowling look a little lame, right?

And what has Rick done for his father?
Not much – except save his life.

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Self-Harm Specifics – ADD girls at greater risk


Remember – links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn
red on mouseover.

In the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series
Part III of an article on Self-Injury & CUTTING
Intenational Self-harm Awareness Day – March 1

OrangeRibbonSelfHarmThere are NO graphic photos or descriptions, BUT if you self-injure, make SURE you are emotionally protected so that reading this article will not precipitate an episode. Have a list of substitute strategies available to self-soothe in healthier ways – you are stronger than you think, nobody’s perfect and I’m on your side!

The Cycle of Self-Harm

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
CLICK HERE for Part II:  SI/Anxiety link

self-harm-cycleHow Pervasive
is the Problem?

Self-harm, or Self-Injury [SI] can be found with greater frequency in certain disorder-populations than its incidence in the population as a whole.

It has been listed in the American Psychological Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders [DSM-IV-TR] as a symptom of borderline personality disorder.

However, according to a 2007 journal-published study it is also found in otherwise high-functioning individuals who have no underlying clinical diagnosis.

(Klonsky, E.D.,”Non-Suicidal Self-Injury: An Introduction” – Journal of Clinical Psychology &
“The functions of deliberate self-injury: A review of the evidence” – Clinical Psychology Review)

Self-harm behaviour [SI] can occur at any age, including in the elderly population. The risk of serious injury and suicide is reportedly higher in older people who self-harm.

Acording to Klonsky, patient populations with other diagnoses who are more likely to be drawn to self-harm as a coping strategy include individuals with the following disorders:

There is disagreement between experts as to whether SI is part of the symptom profile included in these diagnoses, or whether it is actually a separate diagnosis that is comorbid with a number of other diagnoses.

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Understanding the link between anxiety & self-harm


Trigger Warning for cutters

Part II of an article on Self-Injury & CUTTING
Intenational Self-harm Awareness Day – March 1
In the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

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What do YOU do to beat back anxiety?

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

Father and Mother, and Me, 
Sister and Auntie say 
All the people like us are We, 
And every one else is They.

“We’re all islands shouting lies to each other
across seas of misunderstanding.”

~ both by Rudyard Kipling

As I said in the first part of this article, introducing
The Butterfly Project, “to my knowledge, cutting and
other types of self-injury are not true ‘ADD/EFD Comorbids.‘”

ANXIETY, however, is one of the comorbid disorders  — BIGtime  (although not always at levels that warrant an official diagnosis as a disorder, or so incapacitating it requires medication to manage).

Everybody deals with anxiety

In 25 years of experience in the coaching field, I have found the attempt to avoid feelings of anxiety beneath almost all of the ineffective strategies and maladaptive behaviors I have run across, in both “vanilla” and ADD/EFD-flavored coaching situations.

Why?

  • Although humans beings crave novelty to keep us interested and engaged, anything new and different carries a certain element of risk.
  • Risk has both feet in uncertain territory. Human brains tend to prefer safety and security to risk.
  • To feel safe once more — and quickly, too — we humans have a tendency to exhibit a range of ineffective or maladaptive behaviors when we are unsure.

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The Butterfly Project – works for some, not ALL


Remember – links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn red on mouseover.

In the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series
Part I of an article on Self-Injury & CUTTING
March first every year is

Intenational Self-harm Awareness Dsy

OrangeRibbonSelfHarmWarning: If you self-injure, make SURE you are emotionally protected so that reading this article will not precipitate an episode. Have a list of substitute strategies available to self-soothe in healthier ways – you are stronger than you think, nobody’s perfect, and I’m on your side!

ButterflyProject

Self-harm and healing

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

An Eye-Opener for ALL
(essential for parents & grandparents)

To my knowledge, cutting and other types of
self-injury and self-mutilation are not true
“ADD Comorbids,” but the issue is one that
EVERY parent needs to be aware of.

Outside of suicide,
I’ll bet you a month’s free coaching
that most of you are not.

Your kids are only too aware, however.

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Lessons from a Young Blogger


Remember – links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn red on mouseover.

Doing his Part for Peace through Education

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

A very young relative of one of my favorite TBI Advocates** has started blogging.  I have great admiration the intellectual courage of the young!

Were we ALL so brave once?

  • It seems that his first language is not English.  His blog, however, is in English.
  • He is eleven years old, and is allowing himself to learn about blogging “on the fly.”
  • He is willing to risk reaching out to ask for help – and for American readers.

I visited intially to encourage his efforts, simply because I like to do that sort of thing.

After reading one of his posts I began to think that he had a real talent for communication that I would really like to see him develop.

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Back in the Saddle – Beginning Anew


Remember – links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn red on mouseover.

NEW BEGINNINGS REDUX
. . . THREE items in an article about grief and recovery — but probably not
in the way
 you were thinking as you read those words
by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CMC, SCAC, MCC

I. FIRST, let me say that I hope that everyone in New York City (and surrounds) who has been impacted by the recent hurricane is safe and warm. I send a second helping of love and white light to my many friends and colleagues whom I know have been without lights, heat, public transportation, gasoline, hot water and hot meals for far too long now.

I hope that you will all be able to remember to be patient with yourselves and each other as you get “back in the saddle.”

I pray that you will be able to allow yourselves to ease back into the lives and businesses that were disrupted — even though the temptation will be great to “hit the ground running” to make up for lost time.

  • It probably wouldn’t help much to give in to that temptation.
  • It is more than likely that ANY additional hurry-up-and-catch-up pressure will only make things worse (thanks to our friend Mr. Amygdala, and what he does to our PFC at the first sign of a threat to our safety and security).

I especially want those of you with TBI and Attentional Spectrum diagnoses to remember that WE DON’T RUSH WELL.

(One of the understatements of the century!)

Counter-intuitive, perhaps (but brain-based), taking the time you need to think through each action will ultimately garner results far greater than slamming yourselves into action with the fervor of many of those around you.

Do your best to remain centered in the days and weeks to come: to keep your energy contained as you keep your brain in gear and your eyes, ears and senses alert.

Practice Extreme Self-Care

Take good care of yourSelves as you move toward putting Hurricane Sandy in the past where she belongs — moving steadily forward to reclaim the lives you recognize as your own once again:

  • Get enough sleep so that you are ABLE to remain cognitively alert as the stakes increase during the rush to recovery;
  • Don’t veg out at day’s end: move your body!
  • Focus on protein (and avoid junk food);
  • Stay well hydrated — give your brain and body more water than you think you need.

Remember to breathe!

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When the Going Gets TOUGH


Remember – links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn red on mouseover
Hover before clicking for more info

Inspiration to Live On

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

I heard today from “N” — a long-ago client who has since become a close friend, colleague, and confidant.

She was not in a good place

She has been close enough to see the woman behind the STAND that I have taken for my life.

She has been close enough for long enough to have seen repeatedly that my life has been more difficult in many ways than many of you could ever imagine.

She knows I’ve been exactly where she is today, so she called to ask a single question, even though she phrased it many different ways:

  • How do you DO it?  How do you ‘keep the faith’ that you’re on your pathway?  
  • How do you manage to return mean words kindly? (or to continue to do all you do in those times when all people seem to see is what you DON’T do?)
  • How do you keep on keeping on, when you are ready to chuck it ALL?
  • I can’t DO it anymore? Please talk me down off the ledge.

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Thoughts of Healing on September 11, 2012


Healing the Divided Mind

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series
[link to videos by Deepak Chopra below]

http://www.floating-world.org/warnings.htm

Several standing appointments were cancelled today — unexpected and unplanned time to reflect made suddenly available.

I spent some of that time on FaceBook, catching up and connecting with friends and colleagues whom I have inadvertently neglected in the scramble to keep up with the requirements of events that have surrounded me since January.

It was NOT an ordinary day.

I knew there would be a great many posts telling their stories, and expressing gratitude that their loved ones had been spared.

I knew, as well, that many would take time and care in their expressions of empathy and love for those who were not so blessed.

  • expected to see expressions of unhealed pain, loss and grief –
    which I found.
  • I also expected more than a few expressions of anger –
    which I also found.

I was unprepared for the expressions of revenge and retribution.

ALL of us who are able simply must continue to put energy into healing this wound that is gaping still – in America and in other countries affected by retribution-inspired violence.

We will NEVER forget, but the only way inject meaning into this senseless act of violence (and those that came before and those that followed), is to come to a place where we can experience our feelings without BEING our feelings: taking a STAND for Peace, and sourcing our actions from that stand.

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Feel Good Video – Well Deserved


by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? Series

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful citizens
can change the world.
Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

~ Margaret Mead

Phillip Martin – artist, educator, advocate

Martin is the heartwarmingly generous and world-changing artist and educator who created (and has allowed me to use) the adorable graphics that accompany the majority of my posts here on ADDandSoMuchMore.com.

Changing the World, One Wall at a Time

He ALSO travels the world to stimulate cities, towns and villages to work and play together on a project  that inspires positive community involvement as a tool for change.

He does this by creating highly visible artwork with their children — painting murals on the walls of their schools, abandoned buildings, and other places where art can make a difference (at his own expense).

Don’t you love it when the GOOD guys get the press?

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Anger and Advocacy


by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Reactions to the Brain-Based Processing Series

WOW!

In the twenty-five years I’ve been an ADD Advocate, I don’t think I’ve EVER gotten the kind of response elicited by the Processing Speed posts (*links to posts follow article).

AND, I’m thrilled to report, there was not even ONE flame in the bunch, even though only a few of the missives were of the “You Go Girl!” persuasion.

Thank you EVERYONE!

  • For being interested in ADD . . . and-so-much-MORE!
  • For being engaged in life and eager to learn how to “drive the very brains you were born with™” (even if they’ve taken a few hits in the meantime)
  • For taking time from your lives to draft and send carefully crafted responses
  • For being concerned for my welfare (and my feelings)

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Reframing Change for World Leaders


 Rememberlinks on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn red on mouseover.

Leading toward a vision YOU create

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

“Most people try to get others to change.”

“Instead, when leading consciously,
you use the power you have to
intentionally choose actions
that can make a profound difference
in your interactions with others –
both personally and professionally.”
Jean Kantambu Latting

Leading Consciously

If you are unfamiliar with Leading Consciously and Jean Latting, allow me to introduce you to your new best friend.

Although those of you who are regular visitors may have noticed her comments and my replies at the end of some of the articles here, I have been unable to decide how to share more of her wisdom until now.

She is not an ADD/EFD resource, after all — and this is an ADD/EFD-focused blog.

I couldn’t figure out the right “hook” that would allow you to understand why I find what she writes about so uplifting and encouraging — and so unbelievably relevant to those of us who often struggle with leading ourselves out the front door in a conscious manner!

Perhaps, unconsciously, I launched the What Kind of World? series to find a place to introduce Jean, and a great many resources like her.

These adopted mentors and inspirational colleagues don’t necessarily work with ADD or ADDers, and they don’t completely understand the ADD experience — but they are open to attempting to understand, and they admire all attempts at conscious co-creation.

Because they understand human beings, they embrace all of humanity.  It feels so refreshingly good to be embraced, doesn’t it? How lovely it is to be encouraged to reach and grow, rather than criticized or made fun of for being unwilling or unable to live inside somebody else’s box.

We share a single vision, albeit glimpsed from individual vantage points:
A world that works for EVERYONE.

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Oops – Vision, Mission & Purpose – anchors in an uncertain world


Click here for the REAL
Vision, Purpose & Mission article

© Developing by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CMC, MCC, SCAC

roadmapIt was brought to my attention that I had SOMEHOW managed to post an article written in May 2013 with the 2012 archive. AY ME!

To keep from confusing everyone totally, I have reposted it with the correct date, so it will appear at the top of the “most recent articles” as well as archive correctly – so CLICK HERE to read it — with my apologies for any confusion.

FRANK – I have no idea how to move comments, so my response to you remains below – SO sorry for any confusion.

Money Motivation Mythology


Ka-ching!?  Really?
by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

“Money is like manure.
It’s not worth a thing unless it’s spread around,
encouraging young things to grow.” 

~Dolly Levi, (from the musical Hello Dolly!)

I know that more than a few people have come across the quote above, but I always wonder how many are aware of the monologue that accompanies it. Quoting the lines as closely I can from memory, here is the part that captured my fancy:

. . . and all it takes is just a little bit of money.

The difference between no money at all and a little bit of money is very slight — yet it can change the world.

The difference between a little bit of money and a great deal of money is very great — and it, too, can change the world.

“Money, pardon the expression, is like manure. It’s not worth a thing unless it’s spread around, encouraging young things to grow.” 

Fertilizer of a Different Sort

Since I am in the process of beginning life anew, about to take another big leap, I have hyperfocused on feeding mySelf nutritiously. (Oh no, I still eat the occasional chocolate bunny – I’m not talking about that kind of food. I’m talking about feeding my brain and my soul.)

Beginning a few weeks before leaving to speak at the 5th Annual ACO Conference (ADHD Coaches Organization), held only a few weeks ago, I have been making it a point to begin and end my days with an inspirational video. I’ve been a a relatively positive person for most of my life anyway, but even cheerleaders yearn to have a few cheerleaders of their own from time to time.

Right away, I discovered that I had forgotten how incredibly effective they are on a great many levels.

I can’t begin to describe how much more positive, competent, and ready-for-bear I feel after only a few short weeks of this habit — lighter, happier, more like I felt long before I ever suspected that there might be such a thing as a “school of hard knocks.”

I have found a wealth of inspiring content, which I will share with you in upcoming posts in this “What Kind of World do you Want” series.  If your life could use a bit of feel-good inspiration, take the time to click on a link or two at the end of each of the articles with the small graphic of the globe in the upper right corner.)

In any case, think about this as you read the posts in this series, as a REAL question: 

What kind of world DO you want to live into?

Think about it in the same manner that a 4-star chef asks what he or she wants to create for dinner: as if you could cook up anything you were in the mood to eat.

Meanwhile, let’s spend a bit of time thinking about motivation – in particular, the relationship between motivation and MONEY!

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