Consequences of the Race to Erase


Regardless of WHO gets hurt
or WHAT cost to American lives . . .
the incoming administration is focused on getting rid of anything
put forward during the Obama administration — as quickly as possible

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Reblogged: Source posted on the Hopeworks blog

Carefully considering consequences

With the exception of issues impacting Mental Health awareness, education, support and care, ADDandSoMuchMORE.com is not a politically-focused blog.  Since time is in limited supply for each of us, we must each choose our battles wisely. Politics per se is not my battle.

I do my best to keep things as light as possible, and to inject as much humor as I can in the articles I post here.

But there is no leavening I can devise to alter the serious nature of this particular post.

Rather than attempting to to explain why I am so personally concerned – and about more than mental health – I am reposting a brief article written by a concerned blogger from the HopeWorks Community.

It puts a human face on what is likely to result, should the current insurance health policies be suddenly abandoned, regardless of how you feel about the effectiveness of the Affordable Care Act (so-called “Obamacare”).

Following it is a link to an earlier article I posted here, which includes another reposting from Mental Health America.

In addition to some context for the importance to each of us (at the conclusion of that article), the linked article outlines some of the problems with the few suggestions that have been put forward as a replacement for the ACA that the incoming administration is in such a rush to attempt to repeal wholesale.

I added some formatting and a couple of headings to the reblog below, to help with readability for those of you who struggle to stay tracked on text alone, and a link to the original, for those who prefer to read it there.

It’s a short article.  I urge every single one of my American visitors
to give it a read and to consider the implications carefully.
It’s important.

Read more of this post

THANKS to all who read & commented on My Birthday Prayer


You are much appreciated
AND there is more to be done & more we ALL can do

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
from the Mental Health Awareness Series

Turning a Comment into a Post

I added a comment to my Birthday Post to thank my readers and followers for the amazing response from so many of you who took the time to read the story behind my prayer.

I so appreciate everyone who commented with empathy, as well as with the disgust that *I* feel for the TRAGIC and avoidable murder of the son of a good friend, colleague, and leading light in the ADD community.

I am expanding it into an Advocacy article, hoping that more of you will see it.

So what’s the MORE?

God Bless YOU all – and now I hope everyone will be proactive, speaking truth to “power” with a reach further than that of the blogging community.

I ask you to write or call your elected representatives and local hospital administrators – and that you repeat this story to your doctors with an expression of concern that something similar could EVER happen to you or someone you love.

It’s desperately needed, regardless of where you live in the free world.

The police are not the central problem here – but their lack of mental health training IS a serious issue that has needed addressing for a very long time. And that, my friends, is a matter for specifically targeted appropriations – or, as it turns out, lack thereof.

The APA (American Psychological Association) and AMA (Medical) could us a major tune up as well.

What happened medically that allowed this tragedy to occur was and IS INexcusable, totally avoidable and, unfortunately, not rare.

We, too, can become effective Lobbyists

ALL decision and policy makers need to be encouraged to assign a staff member to start reading the blogs of the mental health advocates, the chronic pain & PTSD sufferers and of a great many individuals attempting to get adequate and EMPATHETIC care from their doctors and nurses.

Many too many health care professionals seem more afraid of black and white DEA retribution – due to the way in which the DEA enforces their policies, intended to lower drug abuse statistics, to undercut the effective treatment for a variety of disabilities and disorders – than they are of being called out for providing seriously substandard care to many in the mental health community. REGULARLY.

Inexcusable, of course, but professional cowardice is at least understandable on some level.  What is NOT understandable is the rude and insensitive way in which many patients are treated by the doctors and nurses they look to and PÅY for help and understanding.

I see tales of lousy treatment on most of the blogs – and insensitive treatment on ALL of them. 

I hope that everyone who has posted an article supporting this statement will leave a link in a comment — those will become the only Related Posts for this article.

Read more of this post

My 2016 Birthday Prayer


Today is my birthday
but, awakening from a nightmare,
I’m not feeling very happy right now

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

First, my birthday prayer:

The personal story behind both the prayer and my recurring nightmares follows below.

PLEASE God, we seriously need to upgrade the health-care system in this country. We need a clean sweep of the Mammon-worshipping insurance industry, God, clearing out everyone who is getting rich off the health challenges of the citizens of this country.

Please make everyone aware that, most importantly, we desperately need to FIX America’s woefully inadequate mental health care system, as we vastly improve mental health awareness in the entire country – including empathy for the poor, the homeless and every single one of our veterans.

Lay it on the heart of every single American with breath enough to speak, God. Let them know it like *I* know it, feel it like *I* feel it

Make them realize that action can no longer be procrastinated, regardless of whether America’s new administration is willing to understand or is otherwise uninspired to take effective steps toward solutions that are more than sound-bites and cronyism.

Let the world finally understand that jails and prisons are no place for those who are mentally ill, God, and that Law Enforcement without in-depth mental health training has NO place dealing with the mentally ill.

Amen

Read more of this post

September 2016: Focus on Suicide Prevention


Articles ’round the ‘net
Depression, PTSD and more – the importance of kindness & understanding

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
September is National Suicide Prevention Awareness Month

World Suicide Prevention Day – Saturday, September 10, 2016 – every year, since 2003. I deliberately choose to wait a day to post my own article of support for two reasons:

  1. So that I could “reblog” and link to the efforts of others, offering some of the memes and articles they have created to give you both a quick hit and an overview of the extent of the problem.
  2. So that I could honor September 11th – another anniversary of loss and sorrow, as many Americans mourn the missing.

The extent of the mental health problem

Nearly 44 million American adults alone, along with millions more children and adults worldwide, struggle with “mental health” conditions each year, ranging from anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, ASD, OCD, PTSD, TBI to ADD/EFD and more.

One in five of those of us living in first-world countries will be diagnosed with a mental illness during our lifetimes.  It is estimated that more than double that number will continue to suffer undiagnosed.

Many of those individuals will teeter on the brink of the idea that the pain of remaining alive has finally become too difficult to continue to endure.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
One kind comment can be life-saving, just as a single shaming, cruel, unthinking remark can be enough to push somebody over the suicide edge.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It is PAST time we ended mental health stigma

Far too many people suffering from even “common” mental health diagnoses have been shamed into silence because of their supposed mental “shortcomings” — and every single person who passes on mental health stigma, makes fun of mental health problems, or fails to call out similar behavior as bad, wrong and awful when they witness it has locked them into prisons of despair.

We can do better – and we need to.

According to the World Health Organization, suicide kills over 800,000 people each yearONE PERSON EVERY 40 SECONDS. STILL there are many too many people who believe that mental health issues are not real – or that those who suffer are simply “not trying hard enough.”

This is STIGMA, and this needs to change.

I’m calling out mental health stigma for what it is:
SMALL MINDED IGNORANCE!

(unless, of course, you want to label it outright BULLY behavior)

Read more of this post

The importance of Trigger Warnings


I expect Universities to be places of enlightened thinking
The University of Chicago flunked the test

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
A Mental Health Awareness Post

A Trigger Warning is no different from a RATING

A Trigger Warning is NOT content censorship – it is a WARNINGPeriod.  It allows for the use of coping strategies by those students who need them.

It is absolutely insane to put forth some black and white argument expressing fear that supporting its use in ANY circumstance will facilitate its application to all situations where some student might take offense.

  • Few thinking individuals are up in arms about impinging on the rights of people who want to watch certain types of films simply because they are rated X to guide those who do not.
  • Rational people do not insist that the ban on guns in schools be lifted, holding up 2nd Amendment Rights  (the right to bear arms, for my non-American readers).

And yet, The University of Chicago sent out a letter to incoming Freshman outlining their [non] logic as they disclose that they will not support the use of Trigger Warnings and Safe Spaces on their campus.

Rather than using this issue as a chance to increase Mental Health Awareness, which is to be expected from any institution claiming education as its purpose, The University of Chicago has chosen to issue what amounts to a gag order.

We have a L-O-N-G way to go where educating people about Mental Health is concerned – but for a University to be so blatantly unaware is both frightening and appalling. I’d yank my kid out of that “educational” environment in a heartbeat!

Why all the fuss?

Regular readers are aware of the reasons for my reluctance to use the WordPress reblog function – so I hope you will jump over to the posts below to read the rest of the excellent points surrounding the words quoted below.

In her introduction, Maisha Z. Johnson explains the issue in terms anybody might easily be able to understand, EVEN the decision-makers at The University of Chicago, especially John Ellison, U of C dean of students (who is declining to respond to emails, etc. by the way).

THAT would mean, of course, that they’d bothered to upgrade their egregious lack of education about mental health issues before responding in what I feel strongly is a cruel and ignorant fashion.

Two college students return to campus after both were present for an act of violence.

One of them was physically injured in the incident. In order to return to class, he asks to have space around his desk to allow him to stretch, because sitting still for too long would aggravate his injury.

How would you feel about his request? Would you understand why such an accommodation would help him heal? Expect his professors to oblige?

Now, the other student’s pain isn’t visible – it’s emotional.

He wasn’t physically hurt, but he lost a loved one, and he’s traumatized. Certain reminders have resulted in panic attacks, and he’d rather not experience that again – especially not when he’s trying to move on with his life and get an education.

So he also makes a request, asking his professors if they can give him a warning before covering material that relates to the type of violence that took away his loved one.

How would you feel about this student’s request?

What he’s asking for is a content warning, also commonly called a trigger warning. And it’s a huge source of debate.

. . . when it comes to an able-bodied person experiencing a temporary injury and needing support to heal, there’s usually not much debate about whether or not they should be allowed in class with crutches, a cast, or extra space around their desk.

The sharp contrast between this acceptance and common attitudes towards trigger warnings reveals something disturbing about our society’s approach to trauma and mental illness.

Read more of this post . . .


Read more of this post

Horror in Orlando


What is WRONG with our world today?
And what can we do to turn things around – IMMEDIATELY?

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

Unusual, but necessary

As regular readers know, since the WordPress reblog function is not particularly ADD/EFD-friendly, I rarely reblog. In any case, the WordPress reblog function does not seem to be working at all today — a day when I would otherwise have used it to reblog the post below, put together by the author of the Make Me a Sammich blog.

I usually confine my articles to topics that directly impact individuals struggling with challenges common in what I refer to as the Attentional Spectrum community. I generally avoid “political” posts that do not directly impact the mental health field.

HOWEVER, in response to my horror at the deadly attack in Orlando, I am not able to remain silent about the repulsion I feel for the increase in hate-mongering of ALL types, much of it fomented by the rage that is given expression on Twitter – some by politicians running for office who damned well SHOULD know better!

Hate breeds hate.  STOP ITall of you
and let’s stop supporting ANYONE who spurts venom.

My hand-crafted reblog attempt:

I have copied Rosie’s first few paragraphs below – and encourage you to follow the link provided below her brief introductory paragraphs  to see the entire post. She speaks my mind as well or better than I ever could, and has also included links for anyone who is moved to help – or needs help.

Remember that you can always check out the sidebar
for a reminder of how links work on this site, they’re subtle ==>

Actions Speak Louder Than Prayers: Be the Helpers

As I struggled to form words to begin this post, a CNN notification just popped up to tell me that—as the world reels from the terror attack on Pulse, a gay nightclub in Orlando, Florida, which killed at least 50 people and injured at least 50 more making it the “deadliest mass shooting in US history”—police in Los Angeles have in custody a person who was armed to the teeth and headed to a Pride celebration in the LA area.

So far, the events seem to be unrelated in the strictest sense—i.e., these men likely did not know one another or coordinate in any way—but any attack, or any attempted or planned attack, on a gathering place for LGBTQ people during Pride week can certainly be said to have at least a couple of things in common.

“We know enough to say this was an act of terror and an act of hate.”
~President Obama

In times like this, it’s often difficult to know how best to help. My thoughts—and my prayers, such as they are—do go out to the LGBTQ community today, but I will not pretend my thoughts and prayers are magical and will create change in and of themselves. That takes action.

As a straight, cis woman, I’m focusing my efforts today on amplifying the voices of LGBTQ people on social media and also, with thanks to @PrisonCulture on Twitter for the prompt, I’m shining light on organizations that work to support LGBTQ people and fight for equality and justice in the LGBTQ sphere.

These are the folks who are out there right now doing the work that needs to get done, and the one of the best ways to help in times like this is to support them either financially or by letting others know about the important work they do. I hope you can join me in these efforts to whatever degree you’re able.

Read the entire article by clicking HERE

—————————————————————————————————————————————
As always, if you want notification of new articles in one of my Series of Attentional Challenges Posts – or any new posts on this blog – give your email address to the nice form on the top of the skinny column to the right. (You only have to do this once, so if you’ve already asked for notification about a prior series, you’re covered for this one too). STRICT No Spam Policy

IN ANY CASE, do stay tuned.
There’s a lot to know, a lot here already, and a lot more to come – in this Series and in others.
Get it here while it’s still free for the taking.

Want to work directly with me? If you’d like some coaching help with anything that came up while you were reading this Series (one-on-one couples or group), click HERE for Brain-based Coaching with mgh, with a contact form at its end (or click the E-me link on the menubar at the top of every page). Fill out the form, submit, and an email SOS is on its way to me; we’ll schedule a call to talk about what you need. I’ll get back to you ASAP (accent on the “P”ossible!)
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You might also be interested in some of the following articles
available right now – on this site and elsewhere.

For links in context: run your cursor over the article above and the dark grey links will turn dark red;
(subtle, so they don’t pull focus while you read, but you can find them to click when you’re ready for them)
— and check out the links to other Related Content in each of the articles themselves —

Related articles right here on ADDandSoMuchMore.com
(in case you missed them above or below)

Related Articles ’round the net primarily found in Rosie’s article

Save

#GoSilent on Memorial Day 2016


Honoring Memorial Day

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World Series

If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
~ John McCrae, May 1915

How do YOU relate to Memorial Day?

For many fortunate people – 80% of us, according to a poll taken by the National World War II Museum —  Memorial Day is little more than the official beginning of summer. It’s the day we get our barbeques and lawn furniture out of storage to picnic with family and friends until our Labor Day parties mark summer’s end.

One of the longest-standing events that many will attend this year is the Indianapolis 500, held on the Sunday of Memorial Day weekend.

NASCAR‘s Coca-Cola 600 has been held later that day since 1961 and, since 1976, the Memorial [Golf] Tournament has been held on or close to Memorial Day.

And still . . .

For too many other Americans, however, Memorial Day marks the anniversary of the day they honor that other day – the one that changed their lives forever – a day of remembrance when they hope that the deaths of their loved ones will never be forgotten, and when they pray that their fathers, husbands, uncles, nephews, sons and grandsons did not die in vain.

It is the one day set aside for all of us to honor and remember, as a nation, the men and women who lost their lives while serving in the United States Armed Forces.

It happens every year on the last Monday of May
May 30th in 2016

Many people will take time to visit cemeteries and memorials around the county to honor the loved ones of others who have given their lives in military service, as well as anyone they know personally who has made the ultimate sacrifice.

Various groups of volunteers will visit national cemeteries to place American flags on soldiers’ graves.

Cities and townships across the nation will hold stately parades led by marching bands, often including Army jeeps and other military vehicles, antique as well as current.  The National Guard is often featured in those parades, along with Air Force, Army, Navy, Marine Corps, Coast Guard — active servicemen and women marching alongside veterans of all ages, in uniforms representing many too many wars and even more fallen soldiers.

Read more of this post

Rarely Proud to be an American Anymore


How did our country become so selfish?
An interaction that left me Grumpy – and it’s not even Monday!

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
in the Monday Grumpy Monday Series

Walkin’ my Dog

As someone who moved around a lot throughout my life, I am currently living a considerably more isolated life than I would prefer because I have landed in a town I can’t really understand – Cincinnati, Ohio.

From my experience, at least, Cincinnati seems to be one of those towns I’ve come to call “passport towns.”

An introduction from somebody who’s grown up here – or lived here for most of his or her life – seems to be a prerequisite for even so much as a welcoming smile many days, and certainly the passport needed to develop a community of true friends. Since my move here several years ago, I have found myself quite lonely as a result.

True friends share each others’ lives, not merely conversations in passing or occasional calls for help or understanding in times of trouble. Most of my friends are scattered across the nation, so I frequently get a hankering for a a bit of face-to-face interaction, even though, since Kate Kelly’s passing, I no longer know anyone in Cincinnati I could count among my true friends.

Enforced isolation is something I have not experienced since, many years ago now, I first moved to New Orleans, Louisiana for grad school – another passport town. That surprised me, by the way. I’ve always made friends easily, and it’s extremely rare to need a passport in the South. But I think I finally figured it out.

Commonalities

I’ve observed that the two towns I mentioned are alike in this way: people who grow up there tend to stay put or move back “home,” perhaps because they finally tire of living in some other passport town where they couldn’t develop a community of friends either. In any case, a great many of the residents of these towns seem disinclined to widen their circles to include a stranger without the requisite introduction from a local.

Taking my own advice (from the Series I have been writing on loneliness and isolation), my little dog TinkerToy and I get out several times a day – and I smile warmly at everyone I pass on our walks around the neighborhood (even if they don’t return my smile). I engage anyone who seems the least bit friendly in a passing conversation.

“Hi, how are you?”
“Don’t you just love (or hate) this weather?”

When I notice an expression on a face that seems to indicate that they are about to bring our little chat to a close, I wave them on and tell them I hope they have a nice day.

Related posts:
The Importance of Community to Health
When You’re Longing for Connection

But passport towns are not the central point of today’s post.
Walking my dog is how I came to meet Staff Sergeant Brown.

Some actual connection

My little Shih Tzu TinkerToy and I frequently pass a small cigarettes-snacks-and-beer store that serves the many college students in this section of the walking neighborhood I currently call home. Staff Sergeant Brown was sitting on a stoop out in front, keeping watch on two large garbage bags bulging with cans.

Do you know what he can get for those cans these days?  A whole thirty cents – per pound.

And that’s how this courageous, 63 year old veteran of FOUR wars is currently supporting himself – because he is too proud to beg.

Don’t forget that you can always check out the sidebar
for a reminder of how links work on this site, they’re subtle ==>

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The importance of a diagnosis


Name it to Tame it
“Label Stigma” is very OLD thinking

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
May is National Mental Health Awareness Month

Will this NEVER die?

Do we “label” eyes brown, green or blue?  Would the color of anybody’s eyes change simply because we don’t put a name to that color for fear of subjecting them to preconceived notions about eyes (or color)?

If some narrow-minded person has a prejudice against people with light eyes, does identifying the color of those eyes as “blue” make the slightest difference what-so-ever?

How about height and weight “labels?”

SURELY nobody really believes that as long as we don’t define size by measurement we can pretend everybody is exactly the same — even though we can easily see that they aren’t.

  • Is there some evolutionary advantage to pretending that identifying certain characteristics specifically isn’t relevant – or important?
  • Does it really change anybody’s self-identity or position in the universe to find out exactly how tall they are?
  • Does it change how we think about our role in the world to know how much we weigh?

And yet . . .

Labelling theory, prominent during the 1960s and 70s, with some modified versions still currently popular, has long asserted the exact opposite.

It postulates that, once “labeled,” individuals are stripped of their old identities as new ones are ascribed to them — and that the process usually leads to internalizing this new identity and social status, taking on some kind of assigned role with its associated set of role expectations.

And society seems to like to go along with this BS!!!

When I look around, the most comprehensive internalization I see is the result of the self-identification with STIGMA.

Out of the fear of having their children “labelled” with a mental illness, too many parents avoid taking their kids for diagnosis and treatment – because they don’t want their children to have to suffer the stigma of a diagnosis.

Out of that same fear, many otherwise sensible adults – who would certainly go for treatment if what they suspected was wrong with them were physical – are leading limp-along lives because they refuse to accept diagnosis and treatment for anything that concerns their mental health.  Few realize that they’ve actually internalized the very stigma they think they are avoiding.

MY point of view

As I see it, the reticence to accept mental health “labels” for fear of pigeon-holing or stereotyping allows society as a whole to remain in serious denial about the crying need to stand up and be counted, joining together to sling a few other labels that desperately need to be slung – like intolerant, bigoted, small-minded, parochial and provincial, to name just a few.

And then there’s the label that is my personal favorite to describe a particular kind of tool I’d like to call a spade: BULLY!

I’m calling out mental health stigma for what it is:
SMALL MINDED IGNORANCE!

(unless, of course, you want to label it cowardice)

Read more of this post

When did WordPress change?


When you make a mistake,
‘fess up and FIX it

Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

As regular readers know, I don’t like (or use) the WordPress reblog function because it doesn’t work for ADD/EFD readership, particularly in the manner in which multiple graphics are handled.

HOWEVER, I am making this exception as a show of support for a blogger who is now prohibited by WordPress from following any new blogs or bloggers – EVEN to the extent of hitting “like.”

None of his many followers can figure out WHY —
and others with similar statistics have recently received similar notices
(disclosed in the comments section of the blog that follows)

The response from the [used-to-be] good folks at WordPress is to dig in and defend, rather than ‘fess up and explain how it happened – OR disclose the specifics of the rules by which they sanction (read the comments on the blog of Opinionated Man – my own responses to the WordPress action are scathing!)

BY THE WAY

You don’t have to agree with what he says on his blog to defend his right to SAY it.

  • There will be many people who won’t agree with what YOU say on your blog.
  • Wouldn’t you want somebody defending your right to say it if WordPress responded to them by shutting you down?

AT THE VERY LEAST, click over to click like to indicate that you are aware of this truly crappy decision on the part of WordPress.com and find it appalling.

Links to more detail, including their missives to him,
available from the link immediately below:

WordPress Account Disabled

Making things EVEN worse

There seems to be NO redress for the original action.

From their response, it seems clear that the policy is that if somebody makes a decision on statistics alone, the folks at WordPress.com refuse to revisit – or even EXPLAIN their [apparently new] “rules” for interaction with other blogs with any specificity.

It’s a “circle the wagons” response designed to provoke fear of “over-stepping” undisclosed boundaries.

Didn’t work with ME

My response is WHITE-HOT FURY at the back-end disclosure sans specifics — AFTER we have spent money and a great many minutes of our lives helping to build usage of the WordPress.com platform.

If WordPress doesn’t have the server space to keep up with the community they’ve actively sought and attracted, then they need to say THAT – not this nonsense!

I hope your response is similar, and that you will (as they say in the theatre)
“Sing out, Louise!”

Most companies become suddenly more reasonable once they become aware of wide-spread disdain.

“An appeaser is one who feeds the crocodile
hoping it will eat him LAST.”
~ Winston Churchill

“It takes a village to transform a world!” ~ mgh

What kind of world do YOU want?


FYI – To get to the article, click on the name of the blog (immediately below) or on “View Original” at the bottom.

The longer link goes to a Forum discussion thread that one of the “Happiness Engineers” (their term, btw) has decided to close to additional comments in what appears to be their new black and white manner of avoiding having to comment toward clarification or issue resolution.

How do you want to die?


The End of Life
CAN be comfortable and enlivening

©Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

Why do we prefer to wait with hope, faith and fear?

Many of us rely on our belief in a heavenly father to partner us through our last days on earth.

Some of us put our faith in medical science.

And most of us prefer not to think about
the end of life at all.

As a result, when death comes we are unprepared to handle it in human terms – in our own lives or in the lives of those we love.  As a sad consequence, grief is prolonged and much more difficult to handle for everyone involved.

Thoughts about our own death

I must admit that, even as I age, I rarely think about the plot of my last chapter on earth — but I have recently listened to a couple of podcast interviews that have expanded my thoughts about end of life issues in a manner that has surprised me.

Both of them were inspiring in completely different ways, and both of them are supported by books that add depth to the conversation.

Grave Expectations: Planning the End Like There’s No Tomorrow
by Sue Bailey and Carmen Flowers

A Life Worth Living: A Doctor’s Reflections on Illness in a High-Tech Era
by Dr. Robert Martensen

I think these are both important books on a topic rarely discussed, so I wanted to let you know about them — as well as taking some time to turn you on to a couple of excellent interviews with the authors.

Be sure to check out the sidebar for how links work on this site, they’re subtle ==>

Read more of this post

September 11 Thoughts and Links


STILL Healing the Divided Mind

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series
[link to videos by Deepak Chopra below]

September 11 will never again be an ordinary day.

click image for source

click image for source – scroll to bottom for NEW view

No longer living in Manhattan, I have developed my own “honoring” ceremony that involves searching the ‘net for articles on the topic and taking the time to read them.

I have learned to expect the posts telling their stories, expressing gratitude that their loved ones had been spared.

I have grown used to seeing the many expressions of empathy and love for those who were not so blessed – and I join them in saying a prayer for those whose loved-ones disappeared in so violent a manner.

I always expect to see expressions of unhealed pain, loss and grief – which I found again – and I pray for them too.

I also expect more than a few expressions of hot and still too fresh anger – which I also found.  I pray they will find peace.

I will always be unprepared for
expressions of revenge and retribution.

ALL of us who are able simply must continue to put energy into healing this wound that is gaping still – in America and in other countries affected by retribution-inspired violence.

We will NEVER forget, but the only way inject meaning into this senseless act of violence (and those that came before and those that followed), is to come to a place where we can experience our feelings without BEING our feelings: taking a STAND for Peace, and sourcing our actions from that stand.

Read more of this post

A little help from our friends can make a MIRACLE happen


Pay it Forward

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

Every single one of you can share and forward. Please DO that – for me – in appreciation for what I continue to do for all of you.

THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart

UPDATE: Go to bottom of article for photo of Andy’s new smile – thanks to ALL who helped by contributing OR forwarding.

1 minute video – click image

My very own
“Make a Wish”
campaign

There but for the
Grace of God

Go you and I

My Friend Andy needs a miracle

My request to anyone who has ever benefited from ANYTHING I have ever done is that you become a part of Andy’s miracle in any way you can.

His one-minute video explains what he needs far better than I ever could. The brief text below it adds information and context.

Please click his image – OR one of the links below – and donate just one little minute to listening to his message in his own words — then forward it (and/or reblog my plea). 

The greater the number of people who see his message, the greater the likelihood of ALL of us being part of a true miracle – saving the life of a man who will help save the lives of others.

Please, help me make it go viral.

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Headlines I Want to See in the Upcoming Year


Dream Headlines
What Kind of World do YOU Want?

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

The Upside of the Downside

MediaTreeGotta’ love the media – ONE report of a groundbreaking study and they go wild with their own interpretations — targeted to each of their particular viewers, readers, and branding.

Association blogs and websites join in from a myriad of vantage points, with the individual bloggers in hot pursuit of the same story right behind them.

Social Networks go crazy. We see related posts on Facebook, discussions on LinkedIn, tweets, YouTube videos, TED talks – the entire internet seems abuzz with the news.

Advertisers on the cutting edge target their commercials to catch the wave of increased publicity.  Product development teams are employed to increase sales by tweaking existing products and developing new ones.

MEANWHILE, new funding is approved for new studies to build on the original, further feeding the frenzy as new results are leaked and published.

ULTIMATELY, politicians get into the act as the result of public outcry; caucuses convene to draft new laws based on findings from the original research (that few probably ever read and fewer still understand).

What if it went something like THIS . . .

  • Scientists discover neural-mechanism behind turf building and cognitive competition – possible link to empathy deficiency
  • Collaboration blows competition out of water — recent research
  • Blind Men meet to combine Elephant reportage – New Picture Emerging

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Happy Birthday Temple Grandin


How long, oh Lord?

©Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

Click image for source (FaceBook)

Click image for source (FaceBook)

Earlier today I “Shared” Future Horizon‘s video of a Nashville celebration for well-known animal rights and autism awareness activist Temple Grandin (born in Boston on August 29, 1947 and diagnosed with autism at age two).  On FaceBook.

I prefaced it with the comment below, that I want to share with YOU.

God Bless the woman who, practically single-handedly, gave credibility to what science likes to dismiss as “merely” anecdotal.

Autism understanding and awareness took off, thanks in no small part to her sharing.

MEANWHILE, I went on to say, ADD is still the butt of jokes and target of misunderstanding and censure — despite a lifetime of my own work along with the sharing of THOUSANDS on ADD-focused support communities around the web, my ADD clients, seminars, trainings, classes, blogs and books by knowledgeable colleagues, thousands of published articles by expert doctors, and a whole lot more!.

‘Nuff said today Check out one or two of the links below to read SOME of the many things I have been saying for over twenty-five years now.

 

What kind of world do YOU want?

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Management Talks and Service Walks


What’s WRONG with society today:
a microcosm

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

Mail-truck

“There is more to life
than increasing its speed.”

~ Ghandi

“When leading consciously,
you use the power you have to
intentionally choose actions
that can make a profound difference
in your interactions with others –
both personally and professionally.”
Jean Kantambu Latting

Whatever Happened to Rita?

Awakening early this morning for a much-welcomed change to my usual dark-centric experience of living, I took my coffee for a walk, hoping that the exposure to early morning light might help maintain the unexpected shift in my chronorhythms.

Having time to muse in the daylight is a rare treat. I’ve missed it.

I ran into another of the mailmen I didn’t recognize, parking his mail-truck: odd only because, as long as I’ve lived here, we’ve never gotten mail delivery on our street until late afternoon.

Since Rita disappeared, it seems we are left in the hands of a series of “temps,” so nothing is truly standard about our mail delivery anymore.

It won’t be until we have our own mail carrier again.

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Bumbershoots, Metaphysics, Logic & Coaching


If I prepare for a rainy day,
does that mean it’s going to rain?

©Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
from the Coaching Series, supporting the
What Kind of World do YOU Want? Series

All Rights Reserved

click graphic for cute short story

click graphic for cute short story – shortstories.net

Well, Of COURSE it does! Eventually. But not because you prepared for it. Your thoughts really don’t control the universe.

How powerful do you think you are?

Even if you happen to be a mighty wizard who can command the elements — what about the OTHER mighty wizards who are thinking a sunny day into place for the Teddy Bear’s Picnic or something?

If you REALLY want to control whether you are likely to remain dry, get it together to move somewhere it rarely rains – like the desert.

But aren’t Thoughts THINGS?

I’m right with you on the metaphysics of this idea, but there are a lot of thinkers on the planet.  Sometimes we get out-voted (er-um, out-thought?)

But If you think negative thoughts, you’ll bring about bad things, right?
Isn’t that The Law of Attraction?

I was tempted to buy into this fear-based point of view when I was younger – for about a nano-second.  I was led to believe that it was some kind of “Secret.”

Here are the REAL Secrets:

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ATTENTION on your driving saves $$ and lives


Check out additional info in the comments too – in answer to a great question

driveBrainYour Brain REALLYglobe2_100
Can NOT Do it!

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
From the What Kind of World Series

Heads Up!  The information reproduced below is NOT new news – yet things are getting WORSE!

Science has been studying the driving/multi-tasking dangers for years now, publishing their findings in scientific journals.

FINALLY, it is getting some serious attention from the mainstream press!

MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) did us all a huge service by getting laws on the books that cracked down on drinking and driving. Briefly, our roads were safer and traffic deaths went down.

Despite their efforts, however, we are all now at greater risk than ever because of mobile technology.

  • You probably figured out on your own that dialing, texting,
    or updating your Facebook status while driving is a seriously stupid idea.
    After all, you’d have to take your eyes off the road.
  • BUT WERE YOU AWARE that, according to scientific reaction-time studies, talking on a cell-phone while driving – EVEN hands-free – is riskier than driving with a blood-alcohol content over the legal limit?

DON’T DO IT – and don’t let the driver of a car you ride in do it either.

Just Say NO!

Those of us with attention deficits to begin with really need to heed the warning – and that category includes ALL teens, by the way, whose prefrontal cortices aren’t yet fully developed.

We simply can’t take the risk that we will act on the impulse to answer that cell phone – turn it OFF or hand it to a passenger to tell callers you are not available while you are driving.

Don’t even chance it. Make it a habit by making it your POLICY.

The lives at risk are not ALL yours to gamble!

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ABOUT The ADD/HD All-Expert Consensus Statement


books_history

ADD History and Education

from Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

“Those who cannot remember the past
are condemned to repeat it”

~ George Santayana (1863-1952)
from “Life of Reason

The ALL EXPERT
ADD Consensus Statement

Even as they struggle, desperate for information, help and understanding, MOST ADDers remain blissfully ignorant of the existence of the document reproduced below, much less the information that is contained within it.

Far too many ADD Professionals across several fields are unaware of it as well.

MOST will probably remain so.

‘Sup with that?

I truly can’t understand why even one single ADDer would NOT take the time to make sure they printed out a personal copy of this document and make it their business to distribute it widely.

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Vision, Mission & Purpose – anchors in an uncertain world


Developing a Personal Vision, Purpose & Mission

© Developing by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CMC, MCC, SCAC
– part of the What Kind of World Series
and the DreamCatcher™ Program

roadmapDesigning a roadmap for your BEing through the development of a personal Vision, Purpose & Mission is a HUGE Game to play with your life.

Human Resource Manager promptings to the contrary, not everyone will reach a point where they are ready to work on their Vision, Mission and Purpose — at least not in a manner where it can fulfill its promise as a transformative insight into Identity that will forever alter the steps of your life.

Creating truly authentic Vision, Purpose & Mission statements that will call your life into being usually takes considerably more time and internal focus than most people are prepared to dedicate.

It is a process more globally encompassing than the work and business objectives that are the focus of most of what you will find discussed on the internet.

It’s a Stretch

It’s not an easy process, and is decidedly not for the faint of heart. If you’re not at least a tiny bit frightened or overwhelmed, you’re probably not playing a big enough Game. Embarking on this process calls for nothing less than stepping up and owning your personal power.

You are entering the domain of pure creation.

It may feel a bit like jumping into the deep end of the pool for the very first time.  It helps to have a kindred spirit in the water, arms outstretched – it’s as tough to do in an isolated pool as it is dangerous to attempt in a shark-infested tank.

I am in the process of creating mySelf anew, and I invite anyone who is up to it to join me here on this blog during the year I have given myself to focus on re-creation.

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The Link between Leadership and Spirituality



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ADD in the Spirit – why NOW?

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

Sahdguru“It’s time that people were educated to trust something that doesn’t look like them, doesn’t feel like them — is different.

It’s very important that we open every nation to this possibility that, when new things come to us, it is a great possibility, it’s not a threat.
~ Sadhguru

I recently came across a thirty minute ABC News interview by Beverly O’Conner, normally broadcasting on Australia Network TV. It was an interview with a man known primarily as Sadhguru, the founder of the ISHA Foundation, a non-religious, non-profit public service organization that is operated by millions of volunteers across 150 cities.

The ISHA Foundation is headquartered in Southern India, as Sadhguru travels all over the world giving workshops and doing interviews. He is articulate, refreshingly pragmatic, and non-judgmental. My kind of guy, right?

This interview touched on a great many issues that I think about all the time and blog about a great deal of the time, albeit in different words from a very different lens:

  • stepping into leadership
  • remaining open-minded
  • giving back – balancing the energies of receiving and providing service
  • reaching out in generosity to those who have less
  • avoiding black and white thinking – “holding harmless”
  • the desperate need for a non-incendiary press that respects and enforces the boundary between reportage and “ratings”

— all of which are only some of the components of
a world that works for everyone

.

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Shame on Shoulds



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Assumptions with an Edge

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

Shame on you

“Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.” ~ Brené Brown

“Shame is a soul eating emotion.” 
C.G. Jung

By the time most of us have learned to talk, we have internalized many of the expectations of each of our respective environments as if they were THE incontrovertible rules of life on earth.

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When you lose patience with your ADD kid


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Read THIS for an instant Reframe

reposted by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Posted in my FaceBook Feed
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

StrongestDad

No matter how hard it seems,
the longer you persist
the more likely your success.
~ Jack Canfield

Strongest Dad in the World
by Rick Reilly

Eighty-five times he’s pushed his disabled son, Rick, 26.2 miles in marathons.

Eight times he’s not only pushed him 26.2 miles in a wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dinghy while swimming. and pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars – all in the same day.

Dick’s also pulled him cross-country skiing, taken him on his back mountain climbing and once hauled him across the U.S. on a bike.

Makes taking your son bowling look a little lame, right?

And what has Rick done for his father?
Not much – except save his life.

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Self-Harm Specifics – ADD girls at greater risk


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In the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series
Part III of an article on Self-Injury & CUTTING
Intenational Self-harm Awareness Day – March 1

OrangeRibbonSelfHarmThere are NO graphic photos or descriptions, BUT if you self-injure, make SURE you are emotionally protected so that reading this article will not precipitate an episode. Have a list of substitute strategies available to self-soothe in healthier ways – you are stronger than you think, nobody’s perfect and I’m on your side!

The Cycle of Self-Harm

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
CLICK HERE for Part II:  SI/Anxiety link

self-harm-cycleHow Pervasive
is the Problem?

Self-harm, or Self-Injury [SI] can be found with greater frequency in certain disorder-populations than its incidence in the population as a whole.

It has been listed in the American Psychological Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders [DSM-IV-TR] as a symptom of borderline personality disorder.

However, according to a 2007 journal-published study it is also found in otherwise high-functioning individuals who have no underlying clinical diagnosis.

(Klonsky, E.D.,”Non-Suicidal Self-Injury: An Introduction” – Journal of Clinical Psychology &
“The functions of deliberate self-injury: A review of the evidence” – Clinical Psychology Review)

Self-harm behaviour [SI] can occur at any age, including in the elderly population. The risk of serious injury and suicide is reportedly higher in older people who self-harm.

Acording to Klonsky, patient populations with other diagnoses who are more likely to be drawn to self-harm as a coping strategy include individuals with the following disorders:

There is disagreement between experts as to whether SI is part of the symptom profile included in these diagnoses, or whether it is actually a separate diagnosis that is comorbid with a number of other diagnoses.

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Understanding the link between anxiety & self-harm


Remember – links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn red on mouseover.

In the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series
Part II of an article on Self-Injury & CUTTING
Intenational Self-harm Awareness Day – March 1

aaaclipart.com

aaaclipart.com

What do YOU do to beat back anxiety?

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

Father and Mother, and Me, 
Sister and Auntie say 
All the people like us are We, 
And every one else is They.

“We’re all islands shouting lies to each other
across seas of misunderstanding.”

~ both by Rudyard Kipling

As I said in the first part of this article, introducing
The Butterfly Project, “to my knowledge, cutting and
other types of self-injury are not true ‘ADD Comorbids.‘”

ANXIETY, however, is one of the comorbid disorders  — BIGtime  (although not always at levels that warrant an official diagnosis as a disorder, or so incapacitating it requires medication to manage).

Everybody deals with anxiety

In 25 years of experience in the coaching field, I have found the attempt to avoid feelings of anxiety beneath almost all of the ineffective strategies and maladaptive behaviors I have run across, in both “vanilla” and ADD-flavored coaching situations.

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The Butterfly Project – works for some, not ALL


Remember – links on this site are dark grey to reduce distraction potential
while you’re reading. They turn red on mouseover.

In the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series
Part I of an article on Self-Injury & CUTTING
March first every year is

Intenational Self-harm Awareness Dsy

OrangeRibbonSelfHarmWarning: If you self-injure, make SURE you are emotionally protected so that reading this article will not precipitate an episode. Have a list of substitute strategies available to self-soothe in healthier ways – you are stronger than you think, nobody’s perfect, and I’m on your side!

ButterflyProject

Self-harm and healing

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

An Eye-Opener for ALL
(essential for parents & grandparents)

To my knowledge, cutting and other types of
self-injury and self-mutilation are not true
“ADD Comorbids,” but the issue is one that
EVERY parent needs to be aware of.

Outside of suicide,
I’ll bet you a month’s free coaching
that most of you are not.

Your kids are only too aware, however.

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ADDer’s Got TALENT!


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Getting OUT of our Boxes: Reframing “talent”

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

Grey_ACO_Book_Top

Getting ready for the 2013 ACO Conference in April

This year’s conference, again in Atlanta, will be the largest group of ADD/ADHD Coaches ever gathered. Come meet your colleagues and bask in the glow of ADD-literate transformation.

Over 100 ADD Coaches have already registered.  

We can make room for MANY more *IF* we have sufficient time to change the numbers with the hotel so that they can arrange the logistics BEFORE they sell the meeting and sleeping rooms to some other group.

CLICK over to ACO and register soonest!

A VERY different ADDed Attraction

Judith Champion (2012 ACO Conference Chair), Peggy Ramundo and I are organizing the first ACO Talent Show — this year in honor of the late Kate Kelly (Peggy’s You Mean I’m NOT Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?! and ADDed Dimension co-author).

Dean Solden (husband of Journeys through ADDulthood and Women with Attention Deficit Disorder author Sari) will be working his magic on the piano and acting as MC once more — as in the ADDA years, for those who remember those amazing (and hilarious) Talent Shows.

There will be a special video put together by comedian Rick Green (of ADD and Loving It fame), with edited out-takes from some of the footage from the original video that gained national prominence when it was featured on Public Television.

And YOU – let’s not forget to mention the STARS of this show!  

Come to the Cabaret!  Those of us who have been around practically forever are beyond eager to embrace our newer colleagues, and to reconnect with those we seem to meet only at conferences of this type.

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Endings and New Beginnings


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Graduation for Another Class of
ADD Coaches

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

From 8:30 P.M. until a bit after 10:00 Wednesday night, January 9, 2013, Peggy Ramundo and I had another opportunity to witness Life Purpose in Action, as we attended the final class session of the 2012 Class of the ADD in the Spirit Coach Training.

The small class of individuals about to graduate delivered the content for us.

As always, we came away renewed, inspired, and grateful for the opportunity to be in a position to touch the lives of so many amazing human beings — and to step with them through the journey of training themselves to be of service in a field that didn’t even exist thirty years ago.

It is always fascinating to me to see how many different experiences result from the same training, additional examples of my firm assertion that “There ain’t no IS about ADD!”

Climbing up the Mountain, taking time to look DOWN

In addition to a group exam, one of the final assignments is a Personal Reflection Paper, where each student looks back along their training journey to see how far they’ve come, to attempt to determine what had been of particular value to them.

Wednesday night, they shared their papers with each other and with us.

Each has grown during the year they spent with us, each in his or her own individual fashion, and some in ways they were surprised to discover.

  • An individual whose pre-ASCT life had been focused more on pragmatics (who enrolled here in spite of  the spiritual focus of this particular ADD Coach Training) became fascinated by meditation and Tapping [EFT], now a regular part of life;
  • Another individual, with a background of spiritual training who came because of it, will be using skills learned here in the corporate arena in a traditionally non-spiritual field!

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Lessons from a Young Blogger


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Doing his Part for Peace through Education

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Part of the What Kind of World do YOU Want? series

A very young relative of one of my favorite TBI Advocates** has started blogging.  I have great admiration the intellectual courage of the young!

Were we ALL so brave once?

  • It seems that his first language is not English.  His blog, however, is in English.
  • He is eleven years old, and is allowing himself to learn about blogging “on the fly.”
  • He is willing to risk reaching out to ask for help – and for American readers.

I visited intially to encourage his efforts, simply because I like to do that sort of thing.

After reading one of his posts I began to think that he had a real talent for communication that I would really like to see him develop.

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Back in the Saddle – Beginning Anew


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NEW BEGINNINGS REDUX
. . . THREE items in an article about grief and recovery — but probably not
in the way
 you were thinking as you read those words
by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CMC, SCAC, MCC

I. FIRST, let me say that I hope that everyone in New York City (and surrounds) who has been impacted by the recent hurricane is safe and warm. I send a second helping of love and white light to my many friends and colleagues whom I know have been without lights, heat, public transportation, gasoline, hot water and hot meals for far too long now.

I hope that you will all be able to remember to be patient with yourselves and each other as you get “back in the saddle.”

I pray that you will be able to allow yourselves to ease back into the lives and businesses that were disrupted — even though the temptation will be great to “hit the ground running” to make up for lost time.

  • It probably wouldn’t help much to give in to that temptation.
  • It is more than likely that ANY additional hurry-up-and-catch-up pressure will only make things worse (thanks to our friend Mr. Amygdala, and what he does to our PFC at the first sign of a threat to our safety and security).

I especially want those of you with TBI and Attentional Spectrum diagnoses to remember that WE DON’T RUSH WELL.

(One of the understatements of the century!)

Counter-intuitive, perhaps (but brain-based), taking the time you need to think through each action will ultimately garner results far greater than slamming yourselves into action with the fervor of many of those around you.

Do your best to remain centered in the days and weeks to come: to keep your energy contained as you keep your brain in gear and your eyes, ears and senses alert.

Practice Extreme Self-Care

Take good care of yourSelves as you move toward putting Hurricane Sandy in the past where she belongs — moving steadily forward to reclaim the lives you recognize as your own once again:

  • Get enough sleep so that you are ABLE to remain cognitively alert as the stakes increase during the rush to recovery;
  • Don’t veg out at day’s end: move your body!
  • Focus on protein (and avoid junk food);
  • Stay well hydrated — give your brain and body more water than you think you need.

Remember to breathe!

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