How to STOP chasing your tail
Monday, January 18, 2016 3 Comments
Changing your approach to
Help for Activation, Hyperfocus & Scattered Energy
© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
An article in the Org&Task Series
The Problem with Planning
We’d be nuts to believe that we could carefully plan every minute of every day and that life would line right up with the plan.
For one thing, activities always seem to take longer than we mean for them to take. In addition, a great many other items intrude – including some that cannot be put off.
Unlike our neurotypical friends and families, those of us in the ADD/EFD camp find it more difficult to “let it go” when we see a to-do list with items untouched.
- Many of us who try the typical advice end up becoming so demotivated that we tend to conclude that “to-do lists don’t work.”
- Others in our club feel so overwhelmed by day after day of undone to-dos that we end up doing practically nothing at all.
We need to do it another way
Coming back from my difficulties of the past two years, I am working diligently to [re]teach myself that listing 1 to 3 things in most of the currently active/important areas of my life – not thinking of them as things “to-do” but more “to keep in mind” – is extremely helpful to jumpstart my overall productivity.
My [no more than] 3 Item Overview has always helped me keep these items at the front of my mind – even if they aren’t addressed and accomplished every single day (or week!)
In addition, I always handle more than I anticipated doing on any particular day – every single day. I find it useful to write those items in my datebook and cross them off (as if they’d been there all along and I am the master of intentionality and productivity!)
It’s what I refer to as my backwards to-do list.
Seriously, that little trick helps to remind me, when I beat myself up about delaying the start of certain projects, that I’m not sitting around doing nothing all day – eating bon-bons or worse. It also lets me become conscious about the areas where I spend the most time.
I highly recommend it. You certainly don’t think you’re likely to remember what you’ve done if you do NOT write it down, do you? Besides, it’s incredibly motivating.
Yet if you don’t write these things IN your datebook you are not very likely to be able to find the scraps of paper where you did write them down at the time you need some additional motivation.
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NOT Roles and Goals
Dr. Stephen R. Covey [7 Habits of Highly Effective People] is well known for a much more complicated way to detail what’s important to keep in mind each day than the one I am suggesting here.
The way of working I’m describing in THIS article is more of a system to use when you’re stuck.
When we’re struggling to get much of anything accomplished, we certainly don’t need to spend time on what, basically, amounts to a procrastination task.
When we’re overwhelmed by malaise, it is NOT the time for making lists of values and values-based goals, along with determining the appropriate roles we need to play in the lives we’d like to be leading.
- My [no more than] 3 Item Overview is more of a project overview – sort of a to-do category list with one to three items listed in each category to give us some places to begin.
- Once we kickstart ourselves into getting back into action, there will be plenty of time to re-arm and re-aim ourselves.
- Until then, all that exploration culminating in all those lists is not likely to be particularly useful anyway – at least not in terms of ACTION, that is.
As I said in two former articles, essentially, “It’s always seemed to me that if any task’s worth doing at all, any shade of completion beats chronic indecision and “procrastination” – hands down!
That’s why I love my Backwards To-Do List.
Sometimes I Cheat
I’ll admit that, in addition to using my Backwards To-Do List, I sometimes “cheat” on the fly – writing down something that I need to do later in the day, just to track it – but when I’m stuck, it is AMAZING how much harder it is to actually DO that one, compared to my keep moving and track what you are doing NOW items.
I glance at my [no more than] 3 Item Overview from time to time throughout the day as well, just in case something from that listing looks like something I can handle, given my functional temperature at the moment.
Picking your Items
Don’t make this complicated. When we’re stuck, we need to be looking for any forward progress at all to jumpstart activation.
Is your kitchen so disorganized that it is a toleration to cook a meal? Then use “Kitchen” as one category, and list one to three of the bothersome things that pop into your mind when you even think about cooking.
Are you procrastinating changing your sheets because your other set is still in the hamper and you don’t have it in you to trudge to the laundry? Then use “Sheets” as a category and use “do laundry” or “buy another set of sheets” as two of your items there. If you have a few extra pillow cases, maybe “change pillow cases” might spur further action?
How about the stack of papers covering the dining room table as well as your desk? “Papers” would be good enough to head another category. “Get box,” “throw papers in box to clear surfaces,” and “buy file folders” might be a few to-dos you could start with.
The point is simply to have a basic list of of some items that need doing because they are keeping you stuck – listed in broad enough strokes that some of them stand a shot at getting done. No matter how small they seem to others, they are IMPORTANT because they stand in the way of further accomplishment.
Start small. As your get-up-and-go begins to come back on board, you can increase the breadth and scope of your list and expect to actually cross some of those items off as DONE.
Check-marks and Cross-outs
It’s actually fun writing things down, then crossing them out – as well as thumbing through a few days full of crossed out “Done”s.
- It’s a GREAT way to end the day on an UP.
- If you are anything like me, pay attention to how accomplished you feel, and how much more you get done the longer you work this way — especially whenever you find yourself stuck.
- Notice that some of the items contributing to your longer term goals sneak onto your Backwards To-Do list as well.
It also removes a great many items formerly contributing to the clutter in your brain – that whirlpool of competing priorities that create “brain drain” and increase “brain fog.” Brain clutter is as difficult to move through as environmental clutter, leaving us fatigued as well as demotivated.
TRY IT YOURSELF – and let me know how it works for you. Leave your efforts, responses and aha!s in the comments section below.
Give your life a big-time boost
If you really want to add velocity to your actions – and increase the likelihood that you will actually accomplish what you set out to do – add brain-based coaching to your arsenal of tools (maybe even a daily check-in during periods when you are really chasing your tail).
Few of us have the financial reserves to pay even the least expensive Professional Coach to work daily, but all of us can learn how to trade accountability and check-in services with a Peer Coach. You can set it up on your own, or sign up for Peer Coaching Basic Training and avoid the up-front time figuring out how to do it optimally.
Although I am not able to offer it for free, as I do the information I share on ADDandSoMuchMore.com, I’m hoping that it is priced within the reach of most of my readers, even those for whom hiring my weekly or bi-weekly professional services would be more of a stretch than their budgets can accommodate.
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No TIME to read all this stuff? Want more help?
Sign up for Peer Coaching Basic Training, an inexpensive way to learn the techniques of effective fee-free Peer Coaching.
It will also help you sort through a great many “functional issues” so that you can design an action plan guaranteed to be more effective than what most of you are currently attempting to do.
Classes are a much cheaper alternative to hiring my personal coaching services (and the FIRST time I offer a new class is always your least expensive option by far).
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You might also be interested in some of the following articles
available right now – on this site and elsewhere.
For links in context: run your cursor over the article above and the dark grey links will turn dark red;
(subtle, so they don’t pull focus while you read, but you can find them to click when you’re ready for them)
— and check out the links to other Related Content in each of the articles themselves —
Related articles right here on ADDandSoMuchMore.com
(in case you missed them above or below)
- TYPES of Attentional Deficits
- Progress not Perfection
- ABOUT Alphabet Disorders
- Taking your Functional Temperature
- A Lever for When You are Really Stuck
- Lowering Activation Costs
- The Virtue of Lowering Your Standards
- Getting to Good Enough
- Progress not Perfection
Other supports for this article – on ADDandSoMuchMore.com
A Few LinkLists by Category (to articles here on ADDandSoMuchMore.com)
- The PEER COACHING Series of articles
- The Optimal Functioning (Challenges) Series of articles
(about the Inventory & articles from each category)
- The TaskMaster™ Series
- Time & Time Management articles
- Top Ten Reasons to Reframe Procrastination
Related Articles ’round the net
- Is Crossing Things Off Your To-Do List Really That Simple?
- Why I Write Everything Down, and How I Do It
- How to Balance your Time and Become more Well-rounded
- Making a List
- Crossing Things Off Lists
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