Gettin’ Ready for Twelfth Nite

Christmas Day is over . . .
Make Way for 12th Nite
(January 6th: the day when all sensible ADD Poster Girls
prefer to hold the present-fest)

© Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

Is Merry Christmas behind us now?

I hope your Christmas Day was everything you wanted it to be, and that all of your gifts were happily received in more than the spirit of that thought-that-counts manner.

As many people are now focused on celebrating the upcoming changing of the year, a few of us are still anticipating Christmas celebrations themselves – after a fashion.

We NEED a Little Christmas . . . TIME!


I know – for those of us who celebrate Christmas at all – ever since we were young enough to eagerly await the visit of Santa Claus, most of us have been accustomed to the idea that opening presents happens on the morning of December 25th.

But haven’t we ALREADY made some modifications to that particular plan?

It’s not unusual for families to pick a day where ALL family members will be able to attend.

Blended families frequently have more than ONE unwrapping ceremony – both on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day – and sometimes extending to other days and times as well.

Many of us have long-ago relocated the Christmas present unwrapping ceremony to Christmas Eve, either to make it easier to get out the door for the Christmas service at our places of worship, or to allow us to sleep in on Christmas Day.

I would like to suggest that is going the wrong way, Jose!

Good enough for THREE Wise Men = perfect for ADD/EFD

Legend has it that those three Wise Men following that star-so-bright did NOT arrive with their gifts of gold, frankincense and myhr bright and early on the morning of December 25th.

It took twelve more days and nights for them to get there with the presents: they arrived on January 6th (which marks the beginning of the Mardi Gras Season, for New Orleans aficionados).

Artist Patience Brewster’s Nativity Wise Men


Far be it from me to suggest that those Men had a sense of direction or time similar to my own (which is to say, NONE!), but I don’t recall anyone considering them late to the party, do you?

So, not only is there is some serious precedence for taking a bit more time, there are several substantially great reasons for delaying gift exchange.

Let’s take a look at a few of those reasons that is a bit more serious-minded than my last post on the topic.

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FOUR substantially GREAT reasons for Delay

  1. No rush to wrap! (admit it, doesn’t 12 extra days to wrap all the gifts you hope to give with beautiful presentation sound like heaven?)
  2. No rush to purchase — no more last minute scramble in stores over-crowded with other last minute scramblers. PLUS, you have the advantage of finding out what other gifts your friends and loved ones already received from the preternaturally punctual, lessening the chance that you will be asked for a gift receipt so that your gift can be exchanged (because you KNOW you will have no idea where you put it!)
  3. Less breaking of the Christmas bank — since shopping the after-Christmas and early January sales stretches the budget in a fashion that is practically a Christmas miracle. All of the wrapping supplies are budget-friendly as well.
  4. Time to actually enjoy friends and family — I have friends (and you know who you are!) who are so exhausted and frazzled by the time the big day arrives that the tension in the air is palpable – which seriously dampens the warm and fuzzy glow they were rushing to create.
  • Some may make the deadline, but much of the joy of the process has been sucked practically dry.  Sleep deprived from the last nano-second rush, they are either uncomfortably manic or practically sleep-walking zombie-like.
  • Others barely allow themselves to feel good about what they have managed to put together because the spectre of what they were not able to finish before the December 25th deadline haunts the halls – for all concerned, by the way.  No fun!


keep-calm-entireXmasEITHER way . . .

Are you are one of those amazing souls who can execute a plan like a field marshal?

Or are you more like most of the readers of (who think of planning ahead and curing cancer as part of the many activities we were not designed to do)?

Either way, there’s a lot to be said for remaining aware that the enjoyment of the process itself must remain foremost in our minds.

Giving the Gift of YOU for the holidays

It took me a while to realize that my own yearly frazzle was dampening the enthusiasm for those who Christmas-ed with me.

I’ll bet that, like mine, your loved ones would rather have YOU for Christmas than all of the things you think you have to do to make Christmas special for them.

Since it is not IN me to scale back my efforts in the decorating arena – or to juggle Christmas planning with everything else that suddenly must be done as the weather begins to chill – the Twelfth Night idea made just too much sense.

EVEN if you can’t imagine changing the timing of your Christmas festivities, I’d like to strongly suggest that you scale back when you get frazzled.  If you do, it is likely that, like the reformed Scrooge (after his brush with the three Ghosts of Christmas), you will be known forevermore as one who kept Christmas WELL.

How were the holidays in your reality?

By the way, is your tree still up, or are you someone who spends the days after December 25th returning the decor to its previous state?

If you leave the tree up for a while – how LONG of a while?

What about wreathes and garlands, etc.?  Do those get taken down first, or left up until after the tree has been popped back in its box or carried to the curb? (which, by the way?)

Anybody out there like ME — still decking the halls and planning for a Twelfth Night celebration?

Inquiring Minds WANT to know

If you’ve written about it on your blog or website, leave us a link (only one per comment or you’ll be auto-spammed).  Let’s SHARE our traditions in the spirit of good will toward ALL.

AS ALWAYS, comments of all types are encouraged and eagerly awaited – EVEN from Grinches – as long as you don’t make individual people wrong, and do your best to avoid the dreaded “should” word, I will approve all comers (link-spammers shot on sight, however).

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There’s a lot to know, a lot here already, and a lot more to come – in this Series and in others.
Get it here while it’s still free for the taking.

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About Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, MCC, SCAC
Award-winning ADD Coach Training Field founder; ADD Coaching field co-founder; [life] Coaching pioneer -- Neurodiversity Advocate, Coach, Mentor & Poster Girl -- Multi-Certified -- 25 years working with EFD [Executive Functioning disorders] and struggles in hundreds of people from all walks of life. I developed and delivered the world's first ADD-specific coach training curriculum: multi-year, brain-based, and ICF Certification tracked. In addition to my expertise in ADD/EF Systems Development Coaching, I am known for training and mentoring globally well-informed ADD Coach LEADERS with the vision to innovate, many of the most visible, knowledgeable and successful ADD Coaches in the field today (several of whom now deliver highly visible ADD coach trainings themselves). For almost a decade, I personally sponsored and facilitated seven monthly, virtual and global, no-charge support and information groups The ADD Hours™ - including The ADD Expert Speakers Series, hosting well-known ADD Professionals who were generous with their information and expertise, joining me in my belief that "It takes a village to educate a world." I am committed to being a thorn in the side of ADD-ignorance in service of changing the way neurodiversity is thought about and treated - seeing "a world that works for everyone" in my lifetime. Get in touch when you're ready to have a life that works BECAUSE of who you are, building on strengths to step off that frustrating treadmill "when 'wanting to' just doesn't get it DONE!"

3 Responses to Gettin’ Ready for Twelfth Nite

  1. Pingback: The Single Person’s Holiday Playbook | ADD . . . and-so-much-more

  2. janetkwest says:

    Anytime we can get together is a good time.


    • Ain’t THAT the truth!

      Puppy went to vet today for 3rd shots, so is now allowed outside!! (thank you Lord – this “wild” dog seriously needs the exercise!)

      BIG day for a little guy (4.5 lbs!) – vet, PetSmart for halter & training leash, sweater, etc AND outside!.

      We will BOTH sleep tonite – lol
      xx, mgh


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