The Top Ten Things about Top Ten Lists


Listing what I love about LISTS!

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

As I said on the “Top Ten” Intro post, ABOUT the Top Tens:

Top Ten Lists are pretty much what they sound like —

Quickie sketch of a piece of paper with lines on it - representing the text of top tenslists of 10 items in a particular category that stand out as the top tier of a possible bazillion items for consideration.

Tone generally varies, depending on mood and functional level of the day, as does format.

Some of my Top Tens here on ADD-and-so-much-more will consist of bullet-points without much explanation or context.  Others will be augmented by comments of some sort, and a few will be more like articles with ten points.

Top Tens and ADD brains are made for each other!

Lists with ten items provide the perfect combination of flexibility and structure — with permission to vamp.

(Oh yeah, and because ADD Top Tens are generally written by ADDers, we can’t afford to be too literal about “top” or we’ll be ruminating over the pros and cons of inclusion ad infinitum.)

The subject matter of any particular ADD Top Ten List is limited only by the particular ADD mind of the author (which is like saying “limited by infinity”).

YOU PLAY TOO: Once you’ve read “About the Top Tens,” (or even if you haven’t!), use the comments section below to keep adding to this list (or any of the others that might strike your fancy)

Make sure you take the opportunity to ADD your take on the lists – don’t simply type “ditto” — and don’t invalidate anyone else’s world view, please.

ALSO, don’t get hooked on the “TOP” Ten part – whatever pops into your brain probably qualifies.

AND NOW – on to that list . . .

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Expectations set by appearance


The comments to this post add content – don’t miss ’em!

DeceptiveAppearances

original source unknown

Getting PAST the Visual?

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
A Walking a Mile in Another’s Shoes Post

A recent conversation on a TBI article, Laughter is Brain Injury Medicine – Relieved it’s not me … new what?  launches a conversation that deserves an exploration here — thus, the article below.

(Regular readers have probably noted that Edie, a TBI advocate, frequently comments on the articles I put together to help, primarily, a readership that has attentional struggles and challenges. I comment on her blog as well.)

I hope you will take the time to investigate Brain Injury Self Rehabilitation, the blog sustained by the life experiences and research of former nurse Edie Flickinger.

MUCH of the information that she shares about Traumatic Brain Injury is also relevant to the rest of what I call “the alphabet disorders” population: ADD, EFD, ASD, MDD, BPD, OCD, ODD, etc.

Appearance Expectations

In her article, Edie’s point about appearance expectations (they look good, therefore we expect them to “work good”) is something I had never really thought very deeply about in terms of its impact on the functioning of those whom I have coached and trained — at least, not quite so consciously.

Sometimes Size DOES Matter

BigLittleI have long observed certain manifestations of that particular “expectations set by appearance” dynamic with adults and groups of children.

I have repeatedly noted the greater number of frustrated adults when kids who are much bigger or taller than same-age children struggle with accomplishment (even when a “big” kid performs at a higher level than his or her peers.)

People subconsciously expect a particularly “big” kid to be able to do (or learn, or already know) what they would expect of a child several years older.

If the child performs at an advanced level cognitively or intellectually, it frequently seems to be taken for granted, even discounted (in a manner similar to the way we admonish bigger kids not to physically bully those who are smaller or frailer).

Should the “big” kid be even the slightest bit delayed in development, adult concern can be intense!

“Little” kids (most often if they are female), seem to get a “pass” on functional or behavioral issues more frequently than their “standard-sized” same-age buddies as well — an example of the same dynamic from the other end of the see-saw.

But I’ll bet Edie is absolutely correct that many of our expectations of what a person “should” be able to handle functionally and intellectually are set by appearance standards, regardless of age. After all, we do “dress for success!!”

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Mind, Body, Heart and Spirit


“Extreme” Self-Care Coaching Lab:

Tending the Mind, Body, Heart and Spirit

by Peggy Ramundo, BS, A.C.T., SCAC
Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
Speaker’s Content ACO 2013: Part 1

Extreme Self-Care is simple, but not easy
What Is It?
Putting your Self at the TOP of your To-Do List!

What follows is a synthesis of Conference Binder materials and Speaker’s Notes from the Coaching Lab presented during the  ACO Conference in Atlanta: April 2013

Extreme Self-Care

Extreme self-care is the foundation of a fulfilling life. To experience a high quality life, you need a “high quality you.” The only way to BE at your very best is to DO the very best for you — by making the quality of your life your #1 priority.

Extreme self-care means making intentional decisions about what you want — what brings you peace, joy, and happiness — getting into the zone, where you are in energetic alignment with your Highest Good.

  • It is about turning a deaf ear to the Shoulds espoused by others and by your own Inner Critic.
  • It is about giving yourself permission to “just say no” to those people and things that drain your resources of time and energy and ramp up your feelings of overwhelm.

Why It’s Essential

Remember the instructions flight attendants give passengers traveling with children regarding what to do in the event of a decrease in cabin air pressure?
Put the mask over your nose and mouth first and then over your children’s.

The reason, of course, is that you can’t help anyone else
if you are gasping for air yourself.

“Life is similar: while suffering, suffocating, starved, sapped, or scared,
we are in no condition to assist
[a client or] a friend in need,
much less be able to take pleasure in the moment.

Simply put, healthy “selfishness” is necessary for bringing joy
to others
as well as to ourselves.”  ~ Marcia Reynolds

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Participating in Online Communities for Mutual Support


Digital Literacies Peacock

Why a “Digital Literacy” Introduction?

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC
See UPDATE 4/27 below

I recently received an invitation from Hazel Owen, a woman introducing herself to me for the first time after her first visit to ADDandSoMuchMore.com.

She became aware of me only because I had “liked” an article written by her (hold that thought – it will relate to unwritten “reciprocity norms” when you read the upcoming article).

Hazel is an education advocate who hosts an online community from New Zealand (which explains some differences in slang and spelling you will find in articles written by her).

I found her voice, her background and her community impressive and fascinating, so I accepted her invitation to blog occasionally on her platform.

In THIS article, she is “returning the favor,” offering us some information I believe our entire community sorely needs — a beginners’ explanation of some of the “rules” of this whole “internet communities” thing! In other words, an introduction to the concept of Digital Literacy (dialogue with her in the comments section if you have questions – this lady KNOWs!)

Internet Alzheimer’s 🙂

Regular readers of ADDandSoMuchMore.com are most likely aware of my own technical challenges and frustrations. Most days I feel like a dolt who used to be on top of things.

Although I was once a computer professional myself, it was MANY years ago – decades that might as well be centuries in internet time.  The computer world moves rapidly, so practically nothing from those years offers me any help what-so-ever!!

In fact, after almost four years “off-line” as the result of some personal and health challenges, it seems now that my first instincts about how to do practically anything online are almost always wrong-wrong-wrong.

To make matters even worse, the people I asked (even paid!) for help didn’t seem to get it that I was unable to understand even their explanations, such was the depth of my cluelessness.

  • I had no IDEA how to “work” the software they suggested I download
    to “help.”
  • Other than “scroll” and a few other basic words that meant exactly
    what they used to mean, I was almost totally unfamiliar with the
    vocabulary they employed as they endeavored to enlighten me.
    Sheesh!

Oh goodie, more “in-order-to’s” to master .  .  . must I now give up bathing
and sleeping to fit it all in?

Hazel to the Rescue!

Hazel Owen
It turns out, you don’t NEED to be a technical guru to participate in the developing trend toward global connection.

There are a few basics you do need to know to keep from stepping in – um – trouble by violating the social expectations of the rest of Planet Internet.

After that, however, you can develop your “online literacy” at a pace most of us over here on Planet ADD will be able to manage without giving up basic self-care.

And now, without further ado, H-E-R-E-‘ s Hazel!

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Reflections on my return: ACO Conference 2013


I’m B-a-a-a-ck!

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

It was WONDERFUL!

Peggy Ramundo and I just returned from co-facilitating the coaching lab at the SIXTH Annual ADHD Coaches Organization [ACO] conference, again in Atlanta. ANOTHER great experience to reflect upon, now that I am home and almost unpacked.

Start saving NOW to BE there next year, in Phoenix, Arizona
May 2, 3, and 4, 2014 (pre-conference sessions May 1st)
Mark your calendars, and add a line-item to your budget.
[CLICK HERE for the 2014 Conference Page on the ACO website]

I am so grateful to have had another wonderful chance to swap expertise with my colleagues as I got to connect with many whom I’ve known for years, had the opportunity to meet many of my virtual colleagues “live and in person” for the first time, and to be introduced to many more I hadn’t had a chance to meet in any venue. What a feast!

And we had a BALL!

Again, I must second Dr. Charles Parker’s comment in last year’s post-conference article on his Corepsychblog, “If you are an ADHD coach and haven’t yet connected with the ACO  . . .  now is the time to get on it and get cracking.”

CONGRATULATIONS to the 2013 Conference Chair, incoming president Joyce Kubic (mentored by last year’s chair, Judith Champion), current president Sarah Wright, each of the presenters, the entire conference team and all of the on-site volunteers tasked with keeping the balls in the air in Atlanta.

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Leaving for Atlanta: ACO 2013



CrownePlaza_Atlanta

It’s almost here –
will I see you there?

by Madelyn Griffith-Haynie, CTP, CMC, ACT, MCC, SCAC

I’m leaving Cincinnati on Wednesday morning – yeah, THIS Wednesday morning, April 10, 2013.  Yiikes!

At almost dawn this morning, after packing and repacking all night, I finally had to give up and go to BED, even though I still haven’t streamlined my travel wardrobe enough to get it into one single suitcase.

Isn’t that the ADD way? 

What IS it about going away that makes it so hard to decide what to wear?  So many possibilities, so little time . . . (It must be figuring out the shoes, right?)

To make sure I arrive with my head on straight, this will be my last trip to ADDandSoMuchMore.com until my return a week from this Wednesday. Take advantage of my blogging hiatus to catch up on some of the articles you may have missed.  There’s LOTS here I’ll bet most of you have never seen.  Click around — it will be brand new to you!

Back on the Speaker’s Circuit!

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